When One Door Closes... Ch. 02

We were in the big bedroom for quite a while. Megan joined with me and with Mike before sharing herself with Pat and Jenny that I'm sure of. Mike joined with Francine and Megan and Carol. Lee joined with Carol, Jenny and Pat.

When the activity level calmed we snuggled together and started getting used to the idea and the reality of being family. Pat was curled in Lee's arms and said, "Loving like this wasn't even possible in my mind. I was so into the other game I'm amazed at who I was. Thank you all for..." I held my hand up and stopped her.

I said, "We all had a lot to learn. We're all still learning. I love each of you, completely."

Lee said, "Outside this bedroom there's a party going on. All of them are family too. There's a pool, a hot tub..."

"And Food!" Mike added. He got up and took Megan and Pat with him out the door and towards the kitchen. Pretty quickly the bedroom was empty and we had rejoined the party. Rina and Francine made a huge Shrimp Louie Salad that I shared with anyone who got close to me. It went well with a pizza that someone else had provided. Rina and Pat got together for some intimate time and by their report they became loving sisters and co-wives to the clan.

Late that evening I wandered back to the bedroom and fell onto a bed. Less than a minute later I was joined in bed by two others and we snuggled together and slept. When I woke up later I found it was Jenny and Pat in bed with me. Mike, Carol and Rina were in the bed next to ours.

At breakfast Kat, Pam and Corine joined the party and we spent time talking with the two new squids about their lives and what they were discovering. Both new squids were nurses, injured as they served aboard a ship in the Persian Gulf. Lee and I went shopping to get more supplies for the house. We talked and he asked good questions about the five of us. My opinion was that we had moved from isolationist feelings to embracing the whole family and that time would simply deepen the feelings.

"One or more of the women in your home may have some withdrawal feelings in the next couple of weeks. She may feel like she's losing you. You'll need to make sure she feels wanted, needed and cared for."

"You already know which one, don't you?"

"Both Jenny and Pat. Pat's head understands the difference between the fucking around she was doing and life now, but her emotions are being pulled into feeling like it's just fucking. You, Mike and the rest of us need to make sure she feels emotionally connected to us, not used by us."

I nodded, "And Jenny?"

"She's shared life with Carol all her life. Adding Pat was tough. Last night she saw you with your cock in Megan and it was tough again. You did everything right. You loved Megan and you loved Jenny. You really took care of Jenny. Spooning her and holding her as you slept was perfection."

"I don't doubt you, but how do you know?"

"When you got up this morning Jenny and Carol talked. I listened. Jenny got the message that you loving anyone doesn't take away from you loving her. Carol processed with her and mentioned how loving you and Mike didn't take away from their loving each other, in fact it made it stronger."

"That's good news."

"Yes! Just be aware that all five of you are fragile for the next few weeks."

"You may get a few phone calls for support."

"Call me, Connie, Meagan, Pam, Kat or Corine. All of us are more than willing to coach and listen."

"Ok."

The rest of our shopping trip was about shopping. When we got back to Lee's home he rang the doorbell. It's the signal that whoever's at the door needs help. We got help and the supplies got in and put away quickly.

I found Pat and kissed her, telling her I missed her while I was gone. She was in the living room talking with Susanne one of the new squids. I kissed Susanne and told her I hadn't missed her because I hadn't met her but I would miss her next time I had to leave.

I found Jenny, Carol and Mike in the hot tub. I kissed Jenny and Carol. They both tasted of each other and of Mike. I told them I'd been thinking of them while Lee and I went shopping. Jenny climbed into my lap and spent some time being held and kissed.

Pat came out of the house and joined us in the tub. She sat in Mike's lap and said, "This feels a little strange."

"How strange?" Carol asked.

"Like I'm not supposed to be sitting on Mike's lap. Like I am supposed to be in Mike's lap and... and like I'm unsure of the rules."

Jenny said, "When I was fourteen I went to a party and we played a game. Someone set a timer for three minutes and we each kissed someone for the three minutes. When the timer went off we switched partners and kissed them for three minutes. The first couple of people felt strange when we kissed, then it stopped feeling strange. The last people we kissed felt natural to kiss. It even felt right to let them touch my breasts."

"We're getting acclimated to a new normal. My head already understands that I love everyone here, but my emotions haven't expanded quite there yet. I saw Rina and Lee kissing a few minutes ago and my head told me I shouldn't be watching. I know in my head they don't care if I watch." I said.

"Our old training still is telling us the rules." Carol said.

"Maybe we should remind each other that we're in transition every so often for the next month or so."

"Every so often, like every five minutes?" Jenny asked. I nodded.

"We're pretty in tune with each other, I think. When I feel pulled by the old rules I'll speak the new way to one of you. It will help me and maybe help you too."

It was quiet for a while, until Pat spoke. She didn't look specifically at any one of us... she just spoke what was there for her to say. "I still vividly recall what I felt when I was in Boston or San Francisco. I felt excitement, the excitement of knowing we were breaking the rules and getting away with it. Last night I walked into the bedroom and Nick was cock deep in Megan. I had a flash of remembering walking into a hotel room and seeing a man I had fucked fucking someone else. I realized last night that Nick wasn't fucking Meagan! I was almost overpowered seeing him loving her! Then... he turned and kissed me! It was tangible. The love he was sharing with Megan he was also sharing with me." She paused, went inside her own head and none of us interrupted her.

"In the middle of the night I woke up and saw Nick, spooned with Jenny. I saw Mike holding Rina and being held, but not by me. My first thoughts were that you both love the one's you were with more than you love me. The old rules are so ingrained that they intrude in my thinking automatically. I need to be touched and told I am loved and I need to see and hear each of you telling and showing that you love others too. Otherwise I'll slip back into thinking this is all a fucking game and really, no one loves me. I'll go back to believing what I believed after I got caught, that none of the men I was fucking cared about me at all, I was just a cunt to masturbate into."

I said, "Pat, I love you. Thank you for sharing what you just shared, A lot of the thinking that went on back then we've never talked about. I discovered your fucking adventures and made it mean terrible things, without ever finding out what it actually meant. The rules told me what to believe. I believed my dick was too small, that I was a lousy lover. Now I think the guy who wrote the script for "Cool Hand Luke" wrote the most powerful line even put in a movie: "What we have here is a failure to communicate." We were married, but we didn't communicate!"

Carol said, "Mike and I were married and we didn't communicate either. I'm sure he had to make crap up about Jenny and I and about his abilities as my husband, knowing I was having sex with Jenny."

Mike nodded his head and added, "I told myself often that the two of you had been lovers for so long that what you did was just a habit, not really love. I told myself that, but I didn't really believe it. I believed that one day you'd toss me out and have Jenny move into my side of the bed. I was grateful for every day I got to stay, knowing that one day, I'd be gone."

Pat smiled and said, "It's true for everyone we've ever known. What we have here is a failure to communicate."

"I want to communicate something." I said.

Pat, Carol and Jenny all said, "Nick's hungry!" As we all laughed we all went to the kitchen. We ate, we danced, kissed, played in the water, talked with most everyone at Lee's home and expressed love. Saturday evening I slept with Jenny and Carol. I tucked Pat and Megan into bed with Mike and kissed both women Good-Night. In the middle of the night the four women traded beds. I woke up with Pat and Megan. I loved them both. After I came inside Pat, Megan did her best to suck and lick all our juices from Pat. Corine delivered coffee and breakfast snacks to the bedroom and shared some time with us.

By noon we were dressed and headed home. I knew there would be many more lessons for each of us. I knew Linda and Mark were coming for dinner and they were lessons for us, learning experiences for us and we for them.