Carry That Weight: Beast Of Burden

I sat down and we ordered. For the next few minutes we danced around things before we both grew quiet.

"How are doing really, Amber?" I asked gently.

"Oh," she said wiping her eye, "things are pretty awful right now."

"I'm sorry," I said softly.

"Me, too," she replied. "Of course it was expected. I knew when I went with you it would hurt Jeff and it did.

"He's not handling the revenge thing very well. He thinks we had hot monkey sex all during the time we were there. Of course I haven't told him different."

She smirked sadly.

"Okay, maybe it was me who led him to believe that in the first place!"

She read the concerned look on my face.

"Tom, I'm not sure my marriage is going to survive this, and honestly," she said staring at me with a sad smile, "I'm not sure that's a bad thing."

"Amber, you and Jeff had a good marriage before all this happened."

"Did we? I'm not so sure. If it was that good how could he throw it away like that? It couldn't have been that solid if he was so repulsed by my bloated pregnant body he slept with my cousin!"

"I... I," I started to say before she cut me off.

"No, it's okay. I'm just trying to look at this calmly and logically."

She sighed deeply.

"I know I'm pretty, Tom," she said flatly and then smiled. "Maybe not as beautiful as you make me out to be, but still... attractive.

"So," she said sadly, "if my loving husband would cheat on me while I'm carrying his son and am temporarily bloated, what happens when I become not so pretty? What happens when age gets me and my boobs sag and my butt spreads? God forbid, what would he do if I was in an accident or got ill and couldn't have sex for an extended time? Would he stand by me and be my loving, faithful husband?"

She snorted in disgust.

"I think we both know the answer to that, don't we Tom?"

I sat quietly knowing she was right. Given his reasons for cheating on her in the first place the likelihood of him staying around if things really got bad was pretty low.

"The worst part of this," she continued, "is what it's doing to Amy. She's figured out most of what happened and she's hurt, scared and very angry. She'd mad at Jeff and me and even at you."

Amber saw my concern and smiled sadly.

"No, she doesn't know the truth about the trip. I'll tell her someday but not yet. I'm afraid she'd tell Jeff and I'm not ready for him to know everything yet."

"Why?" I asked softly.

"If he isn't willing to work on our marriage now, I doubt I'll trust him to do it in the future."

"I can understand that, I guess," I conceded. "I'm sorry you and Amy are going go through all this. It kills me to think Amy hates me."

"She doesn't hate you," Amber said and gently put her hand on mine. "I'd never let happen, but you've lost your hero status, at least for the time being."

I nodded and played with the food on my plate.

"How are Arlene and Jeffrey handling all this?"

"I guess they're doing as well as can be expected," I replied. "Arlene is still furious at her mother and very disappointed in me for going away with you. She suspected it wasn't as bad as her mother believed at the time.

"Jeffrey tried to handle it like his mother. He tried to put on the same stoic face Ashley tries to wear, but you could tell he was hurting.

"Have you told them the truth about our trip yet?"

"Yeah, after we got back from the family reunion. I didn't go into a lot of detail but gave them some of the basics."

I snorted a small laugh.

"Their reactions were very different. Arlene screamed 'I knew it!' and gave me a huge hug while Jeffrey nodded and said he was glad to hear I hadn't lowered myself. It was obvious he's still going to hide his pain and disappointment.

"Both kids are still on pins and needles when we're all together. There's still the fear that Ashley and I won't make it and end up getting a divorce."

"So you and the bitch are going to try to make the marriage work?"

I nodded and stared at Amber. She returned my gaze with a small sweet smile.

"What?" she giggled.

"Some of those things you told Ashley about our trip were pretty coldblooded. You cut her deep."

"Good!" Amber replied sharply. "The bitch should hurt! She slept with her cousin's husband, her husband's best friend. She betrayed you and me and our children. She should hurt!"

Amber looked at me then sighed.

"I'm sorry, Tom, but don't ask me to feel bad for her. I think I'm owed a little payback don't you?"

"I understand, completely," I said nodding slowly, "but you two are family. There'll come a time you'll need to at least be able to be in the same house without being nasty to each other."

"True," Amber said with a predatory smile, "but not for a while yet."

We talked and ate and enjoyed each other's company for the rest of the meal. She seemed to be doing better than I expected even though I had serious doubts about whether their marriage was going to make it or not.

As we were saying goodbye after lunch, she gave me a huge hug. I felt her warm body press next to mine and I let out a small groan. She chuckled and then leaned back and looked me in the eyes with her arms still around my neck.

"You know Tom," she said very softly, "I'll always regret not attacking you while we were in Miami, just to see if there was more chemistry between us than you'll admit to. I'll always wonder if you and I could've made a go of it."

"I'll struggle with it as well, Amber. You're a very special woman and whoever you give your love to will be a very lucky man. I'll wonder what my life would've been like if it would've been me."

She smiled and reached up and gave me a warm passionate kiss.

"Amber?"

"All right I'll be good," she cooed then grinned. "Well I'll be better. Don't worry, I'll back off... lover."

She turned and giggled evilly as she walked away.

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Chapter 4 - Epilogue

As I lay here taking in the warm Caribbean sun, I have to smile. My wife looks incredible in her bikini even at her age. It's taken ten years to convince her to take this cruise, but we're finally here.

The past decade has certainly had its highs and lows. Ash and I are still together, much to the surprise of some, and our marriage continues to get stronger. It'll never be as good as it could've been before our year from hell, but it's still a good marriage and getting better.

In the end, we both chose to forgive each other. Chose? Yeah it was a conscious choice not an emotional one. It also meant making that decision daily until it got easier and easier. Did it mean we forgot what the other had done? Of course not, those scars will remain with both of us for a lifetime. It would be a long hard road, but it would one we'd walk together.

Over the years my relationship with my children has continued to get stronger. Even my relationship with Amy has improved. It was painful at first looking into her eyes and knowing she blamed me as well as her parents for the nightmare she was going through. Her heroes had proven themselves flawed, and that was hard to watch.

Things improved between us when Amber confessed to her and Jeff what had, and hadn't, happened in Miami. It made a big difference to Amy but not to Jeff. By then, the marriage was crashing against the rocks. The trust was basically dead, and neither of them knew how or even if they wanted to save their marriage.

Eight months later Jeff filed for divorce. Two weeks later, Amber went to Tampa on vacation. The divorce started out as fair and peaceful as those things can be but then became ugly. A couple of the Connor elders did get involved and Jeff ended up selling his business at a loss. The monies from the sale provided Amber and the kids a decent financial future but of course, the Connor family would look out for them as well.

Jeff moved on and we haven't seen much of him since the divorce. We heard he started another business and it's starting to do well. We also heard he re-married, though it was no surprise we weren't invited to the wedding.

I considered trying to extract my pound of flesh from him, but decided against it. He'd lost his wife and kids, his best friend, his business and the support of the Connor family, all for a night with my wife. I guess in the end, I still felt like I owed him for saving my life all those years ago, so I let it go.

Paid In Full.

After the divorce was final, Amber and Amy moved to Tampa. Not surprisingly Amber started dating Allen. Amy and TJ fell in love with him immediately, and two years later they were married.

Ash and Amber tried to mend their relationship before Amber moved, but it was too damaged. Now, they're polite to each other and can be in the same room without any drama, but their close friendship is dead. They are, however, still cousins so they don't avoid each other. We even went to visit them about five years ago.

We went to Clearwater Beach and besides getting a nice tan, I came away with a new appreciation for the Connor genes. Seeing Ash at forty-eight years old at the time, Amber at thirty-eight, Arlene at twenty-one and Amy at eighteen, all looking smoking hot in their bikinis gave Allen, Jeffrey and I, along with a few thousand other guys who were on the beach those days, a definite appreciation for Connor women.

As I now stare at my beautiful wife, I realize that even at fifty-three she still turns the heads of most men. My Ash is definitely a MILF, oops excuse me, a GILF since Arlene and her husband have given us two grandkids. Jeffrey got married last year, and now he and his wife are expecting their first.

My decision to try and save my marriage seems to have endeared me even more to the Connor family. Ashley and I were even asked to represent the Connor Foundation on several occasions.

Did I make the right decision? I think so, at least for me. Carrying that burden of guilt was killing my marriage, even if I didn't put it there in the first place.

Whatever choice I decided to make back then, I knew it was time to move on with my life. There've been times when I think of Amber and wonder, what if. But then I pull Ash tight to me and she reminds me I made a good choice. It may not have been the best choice but it was a good choice still the same. I think Ash can tell when I'm having those thoughts because she seems to do her best to try and make sure I never regret my decision.

It could be that it's only my imagination, but I like to think it's not.

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Added Note: My personal preference would've been for Tom to end up with Amber but that wasn't the way I felt HDK wrote his story. It was bent towards reconciliation, so as a tribute that's where I took it. Hopefully it was believable.

My thanks again to HDK for all his offerings on this site! I've enjoyed so many of them and look forward to even more.

Just a heads up so as not to piss everyone off, I'll be doing some maintenance on this Comments Section unlike my other stories. That means I'll respond to comments and delete ones that are negative or derogative towards HDK. That'll be why someone's 10,000 word critique masterpiece that just had to add a dig at HDK at the end was deleted. I'll treat those very insightful, inspired comments like I would a stunningly beautiful wedding cake with a piece of dog shit on top of it... I'll simply flush.

Why? Well this is a tribute piece, duh. It would be like me going into the Liberace Museum and spewing shit about Liberace. Things like "He sucks! (his music not his personal lifestyle! LOL!) I wouldn't be surprised when someone asks me if I'm stupid or just an asshole since I DID walk into the museum knowing who the hell it was honoring.

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