Honor Thy Mother & Thy Father Ch. 27

"Colonel, we don't have that capability, you will have to wait until we land."

"Lieutenant, I have that capability with me. I need to know if I will screw up your avionics. I don't want the airplane to fall out of the sky. It would ruin my day."

"It would ruin my day also, Colonel. How long before you are set up to transmit?"

"I will have to move to the rear of the aircraft, set up my satellite link, and code the message. That should take me 15 to 18 minutes."

"Colonel, you still have nothing to transmit to. How are you going to work that out?"

"Can you keep your mouth shut Lieutenant?"

"I don't even tell my wife what I'm doing."

"That's good enough for me. You will stay married longer that way. I never transmit through the U.S. Satellite Communication Net. I bounce my signal off a dead Russian satellite directly to a DIA satellite, which downloads it to our headquarters in Virginia. It takes about eight milliseconds longer to go this way, but it is much more secure."

The Lieutenant laughed. "You spooks are something else. You always have a trick up your sleeve. When you are ready to transmit, have your Sergeant tell the loadmaster that you are ready. I will turn off all the aircraft's computers and fly this beast by hand. Please don't stay online too long, or a lot of people are going to get airsick."

"How does 18 seconds sound to you? In 25 seconds, you can turn on your computers, and let them take over."

"That works for me Colonel, let me know when you're ready to begin."

"Thank you Lieutenant, I will take care of it."

As he reached the starboard side of the aircraft, he tapped the loadmaster on the shoulder and asked him to accompany him.

"Sergeant Zachary, you are with me; bring the gear."

"Yes sir."

Sergeant Zachary picked up the communications suitcase, and followed the Colonel down the starboard side of the aircraft. As they passed the rear portion of the wing Colonel stopped, turned and spoke to the loadmaster.

"Sergeant, look at your watch and memorize the time when the secondhand reaches the zero, say 'GO.'"

The Colonel and Sergeant Zachary both looked at their chronometers, and waited for the loadmaster to mark his time.

"GO."

The Colonel and the Sergeant hit a button on their chronometers.

"Sergeant you will walk at an even pace back to the crew area and sit down. In exactly 11 minutes, you will walk to the port side of the aircraft, pick up the telephone, and speak to the pilot. Tell him to turn off the aircraft's avionics. When he has turned them all off, tell him to bounce the airplane twice, and I will begin transmitting. 25 seconds later, tell him to turn the computers back on. Do you have all that, Sergeant?"

"Yes sir, every word of it."

"The timing is absolutely critical. I do not want to fry the aircraft's computers. If I do it is going to be a long and bumpy ride to Christchurch. According to your Lieutenant, there are going to be many people who are going to be airsick. I would hate for you and your men to have to clean it up."

"So would I sir; so would I."

"Okay Sergeant, this aircraft and the rest of our trip is depending on you. Wait until your watch hits twelve, and start moving."

The Sergeant looked seriously at his watch, and his head started to nod with each passing second. Seriously, he said, "Go."

********

Paul Zachary asked, "Why did you give us so much time, Colonel?"

"I had to be sure we could pick up the satellite and hold onto it from a moving aircraft. It's the first time I've tried it, and I don't want to screw it up. We have to contact our men, and get this message out."

"You've already encrypted it. It's going to be like shooting fish in a barrel."

"Paul, I hope you are right. I hope all our men are assembled in Leesville. I want them to slip into Fort Polk, and start training with the infantry battalions. I want all our people as sharp as the tip of the spear. Once we have Harold, Callie, and her FBI contingent out of our hair, we can take care of the business in St. Louis. If Schneider, can get his jet to New Zealand, on time, we won't have to take a commercial airline back to the states together. We will be asked too many questions, and our cover will be blown."

"Now you know why I follow your orders, sir, and don't ask you any questions. You are ten steps ahead of me at every turn."

"Maybe not ten, but I am supposed to be a little ahead of you. You have a great head on your shoulders, and you have proven that for the past 18 years. I don't carry deadwood Paul. You have risen to every test I have ever given you, and passed each one."

"Thank you sir, coming from you I consider that a greater compliment than any medal the Army could give me."

"Okay, let's get to work. He should be getting ready to walk to the phone now. Let's warm up the satellite transmitter, and load the program."

Lieutenant Morris bounced the airplane twice indicating he was flying the aircraft.

Sergeant Zachary hit a switch, and the small antenna started to servo in circles in an attempt to lock on to the dead Russian satellite. It refused.

After six seconds he said, "Sir, look at the legs; they're bouncing off the floor, because of the turbulence. Let's hold them down and see if the damn thing will settle down."

"Brilliant Sergeant, but who's going to hold the fifth and sixth legs?"

"Let's hope that four will do sir."

"I was going to say that next Paul. You stole my line."

"I'm sure it was unintentional sir."

"Shut up and grabbed the legs."

The antenna locked on the satellite, and the message was transmitted automatically. After a total of twenty-four seconds had passed, a green light flashed, indicating the message had been received in Leesville.

Shut it down Paul, before we fry the computers."

Due to the delay between powering up the computers, and loading the GPS and flight damper programs, 33 seconds had passed. If it had been instantaneous, Lieutenant Morris, and his copilot, would have been wrestling that bear for three hours, all the way to Christchurch, New Zealand.

"How did it go Lieutenant? We didn't fry anything, did we?"

"Smooth as a baby's rear end Colonel. I'm glad we could be of service."

"I am glad to hear that, because we had trouble zeroing in on the satellite. That took us a few more seconds than we anticipated, but I guess you anticipated that, and held off before turning the computers on."

The Lieutenant didn't want to say that he screwed up, or that it took time for the programs to load, so he took credit for the delay.

"Sir, there is always the possibility of something going wrong, even with the best laid plans. The aircraft was handling beautifully, and I was in no hurry to put it back on the computers. Giving you an extra ten seconds to make sure you accomplished your mission was no problem up here."

"It made all the difference to us. Thank you very much for all your help."

*******

117. A Small Diversion

Dycke Schneider received a phone call from a man who claimed to be an assistant to FBI Director Michael Free, and asked if he could perform a service for the agency.

After receiving the message, Dick said he would work on it immediately.

In Mexico City, Payne was just getting ready to leave for Charleston, when he called.

"Hello twerp, I was just getting ready to come home. That communications billionaire is all hands and no brains. He knows I'm married, and didn't give a shit. All during the trip, he wanted me out of the flight deck, and into my pants."

"Would it have sealed the deal?"

"Dycke, you are dead man."

"If he touched you, he would have been a dead man."

"That is a much better attitude, dummy."

"You know, for a man who just had his balls cut off so you wouldn't have any more children, you are being very nasty to me."

"They did not cut off your balls. It only feels that way. If anyone is going to cut them off, it will be me, and I won't use an anesthetic."

"When you get home, the cheeks of your ass are going to be so red you won't be able to sit in a cockpit for a month."

"Do you promise, do you really promise?"

"I promise you the entire world, and you want your ass spanked."

"You better not be fooling with my affections. You know how angry I can get."

"I have a favor to ask of you. I need you to pick up Harold, Callie, and her escorts and bring them back here."

"Absolutely, I will love to hear about their honeymoon. Where are they?"

"It will keep you away from home for a few more days."

"I'll do it, Dycke. Where are they?"

"You really don't have to do it, I can get someone else."

"Dycke, if you don't tell me where they are, I'm going to go home first, beat the shit out of you, and then go get them."

"Okay, but remember, I gave you the way out."

"I swear if you don't tell me where I am going, I am going to kill you."

"Christchurch, New Zealand!"

"What, you are going to get killed. That's 7000 miles away from Mexico City; 9,000 miles away from Charleston. You tricked me. You are never getting laid again. I am going to find that Mexican bastard, and let him fuck me. I hate you Dycke Schneider. You are going to keep me away from my children for four more days. I think I'll come home by way of Singapore. I understand they have shops there that cater to people with BDSM tendencies. I am going to create some new ones just for you."

"Payne, I am taping this conversation. I will play it for our divorce lawyers. I offered you multiple ways to get out of going to pick our friends up. I told you I would have someone else do it. I told you that you would be late coming home. I don't remember how many times I warned you not to go. You kept saying you wanted to pick up Harold and Callie; and how much fun you would have listening to their honeymoon stories."

"You would divorce me over that?"

"You just threaten to murder me. I would have to protect myself and my business interests. There is no telling what harm you could do. Nearly 40,000 people depend on me for their paychecks. I would have a choice of continuing to live with a person who threatens my life, or continuing to employ forty thousand hard-working men and women. Honestly, what would you do?"

"Dycke, you are bastard."

"You know my mother and father, so you know I'm not the bastard. Payne, you are on the verge of being a murderess. What would you have me do? You are the love of my life. I loved you from the moment I first saw you. However, I will not let you kill me. Our children will need at least one parent to raise them, while the other is in jail.

"Dycke, I would never kill you. It would take the fun out of beating the crap out of you."

"If you will put that in writing, I will not divorce you."

What happens if I'm lying?"

"If you are lying, I will have to do what Bob and Fiona taught me over the years, without holding back. You remember how much fun that was, don't you?"

"The last time you did that to me was the day before our wedding. It was no fun for me, because you were sitting on my back, after you nearly broke my arm."

"You would have looked beautiful coming down the aisle in that gorgeous gown, and a cast on your arm."

"Fuck you Dycke.

"That option is always available to you dear. Now, Payne, answer my question: Do you want to pick up Harold and Cassie in New Zealand, or not?"

"Yes, Dycke, I will get them, but you are going to owe me big time when I get back."

"I am not. I offered you a way out and you refused."

"I hate you Dycke Schneider."

"I love you Payne Schneider."

That's cheating Dycke."

No, it's the truth."

"You can't say that when we're arguing."

"We weren't arguing. I was having fun at your expense. I knew where Harold and Callie were, and watched you put both of your big feet into your big mouth."

"You don't play fair Dycke."

"I seem to remember you saying that on many occasions, and on each of those occasions, I had the pleasure of taking your delicious ass for a ride."

"We will see about that when I get home."

"They need you in New Zealand as quickly as possible, babe. Someone is after them, again."

"Why didn't you say so in the first place? Sometimes, Dycke, I think your dick is between your ears."

"When you get back, I will be healed enough to prove that you are wrong."

"Sex, Sex, Sex. Is that all you men ever think about?"

"No, but I believe it is nine times every minute."

"You are in such deep trouble, mister. If you didn't love me, and give me three beautiful children, the balcony would not be a safe place for you."

"Payne, I am recording this conversation."

"Good! It will show the judge and jury that I was driven insane by my husband. Now leave me alone, I have just arrived at my Pink airplane. I have to file a flight plan to Christchurch."

"You already did, dear."

"You were that sure of me?"

"There was never a doubt in my mind."

"I must've been a real easy lay, because you have never gotten me wrong yet."

"You are the easiest lay I have ever had. You are also the only lay I have ever had."

"Me too, at least we have something in common."

"We have three children in common."

"Okay we have two things in common."

"We live in the same apartment."

"Dycke, hang up before you get into more trouble than you can handle."

"Bring it on babe; I will finish it in bed when you get home."

"You are not playing fair Dycke."

"I love you Payne."

"Hang up Dycke, I am about to start the engines. Take care of the children; I'll see you in three days."

"I thought you said four days?"

"I lied. Good by twerp. I love you. Tell Harold I will be there in Ten hours and ten minutes.

"I can see your red ass in my minds' eye already, my love.

"Don't you tease me; I will be very angry with you, if you are."

"Have a safe trip, sweetheart. I love you, and I will continue to train you, until I get it perfect."

"That's it Dycke, you are definitely a dead man. Your ass gets hit by the paddle's first."

"With your puny arms my dear, I won't feel a thing. Now, go fly your toy, and pick up our friends before something bad happens to them."

"We will see about my puny arms when I get home Mister. You may have to stay home from work for a week when I get through with you. I am hanging up now, because we are starting to taxi out to the runway. Good by twerp, I still love you."

"I'll warm up the paddle."

118. There's Been A Changes in Attitude

Finals were rapidly approaching. Sandy called her mother and told her Cindy and she would not be coming home for the weekend. They had so much studying to do they did not believe they would ever be finished on time.

Sharon sounded very sympathetic to their plight. "I understand baby. I know you want to do this without your dad's help. I can understand your refusing his offer to teach you how to take these exams. You are young women now, and want to do this on your own. I cannot tell you how proud I am of you for taking this moral stand. I look forward to seeing you whenever you have time to come home."

"Fuck, I forgot about his offer."

Sharon said, "That's one misdemeanor Sandy."

"Wait a minute, I'm not at home."

"You are talking to your mother, are you allowed to talk to your mother that way?"

"Shit, no I am not."

"That's two misdemeanors little one."

"Mom that's not fair. I'm 18 miles away from you, and you are treating me like I am at home."

"You have to learn to control your mouth when you are talking to an adult. If you wish to speak to me or your father, speak with respect, or don't call us."

"Mom, you are a pain in the ass."

"I certainly will be when you get home young lady."

"That's not close to being funny mom."

"It was not meant to be funny. It was meant to drive my message home to you. Did it?"

"Yes mother, it did."

"Twenty smacks on your sweet rear end will make an indelible impression on your mind to watch your mouth missy. My wedding is 2 ½ weeks away. You will be spending Christmas and New Year's at your Uncle Clark's home. Foul or offensive language will embarrass your father and me greatly. It will be an unforgivable offense. Do you understand?"

"Mother, there is one thing the girls and I would never we do. We would never embarrass you. Our lives have become idyllic, since you and dad got together. We have become a stable loving family. It is fun to come home and be together. I'm not talking about the sex, which is wonderful. I'm talking about the fun we have at the dinner table, and talking together. The day you shoved the dildo up daddies behind was the funniest day of all. In any other family, all hell would have broken loose; but not with us. It was funny, and everyone, especially daddy, took it that way. There were no repercussions, no anger, just laughter. The look on his face was priceless. If we had a picture, I would' have put the look on his face on YouTube, and received a million postings, wondering what had happened to him."

"Thank goodness we didn't have a camera out. If you're uncle Clark had seen that picture, he would castigate your father for years. When should we expect you home sweetheart?"

"How did you know we changed our minds?"

"Tell Cindy, if she wants to whisper in your ear, to use the ear away from the phone."

"I am sure he has it wrong mother. She cannot possibly be the smarter sister."

"Finals are coming. Your grades will prove if your father is incorrect or correct. Don't forget to do all the extra credit questions this time."

"For how many years am I going to hear about that?"

"I think I will say those words with my final breath."

"Mother, that is far from being funny."

"Darling, I think you said that already."

"Goodbye mother, you'll never guess what Cindy wants for dinner."

"Tell her she's getting Burger King."

Cindy yelled, "I can get that here at school."

Sharon said, "Tell your sister that it's her choice."

"Mom said it's your choice."

"Fuck, I hate when she does that to me."

"Tell your sister that's one."

With a big grin she said to Cindy, "Mom wants me to tell you that is one misdemeanor."

"Screw her, I'm not at home."

"Tell your sister that is three misdemeanors, and if she opens her mouth one more time, it will be a felony."

"Mom don't do that to her. Christmas is coming."

"Tell that to your sister."

"Cindy, listen to me carefully. Mom said that is three misdemeanors, and if you open your mouth to her one more time, it becomes a felony. Do you know what that means with Christmas coming?"

Indignantly, Cindy said, "Yes."

Sandy screamed at her sister. "I couldn't hear you. Say it again."

In a slightly louder voice Cindy said, "Yes, I understand."

"I still didn't hear you. If you piss me off one more time I'm going to grab you by your hair and swing you around this room, until it falls out. Say it out loud."

Cindy screamed at the top of her lungs. "Yes mom, I understand that it's three misdemeanors. If I talk back to you one more time it becomes a felony. I am sorry. My mouth overloaded my brain, as usual."

"Give her the phone Sandy."

"Hi mom, I'm sorry about that."

"Cindy, I don't believe you are sorry for one minute. I think if you could get away with it again, you would. I am not going to speak to Fred about this. My wedding is coming up shortly, and I don't want him getting angry. If you do anything else between now and then, you will not be part of our wedding party. You may say so what to me now; however, in years to come, when people look at our pictures, they are going to ask why you aren't in them. I will let you give that explanation. When you finish lying, I will tell them the true story. Get your act together Cindy. I don't know what's bothering you, but if you want to talk, I am always available. If you want to talk to Fred, he is always available. Nothing that you tell us will ever leave this house. We are friends, but more than that, we are, and always will be FAMILY."