Jail Breaking

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Christmas Eve we spent at the in-laws as had become the custom, But Christmas day was a big feed at my family home. We arrived early due to some agreement between my Mom and Doris. As usual Doris had made a huge roast turkey complete with the stuffing. Mother Boswell was making a crown roast of lamb, and my Mom had a ham in the oven. It was about one o'clock when I was lifting the stuffed Turkey in the heavy iron roasting pan from the trunk of Doris' new Mercedes. The car's hefty down payment had been a birthday present from her parents.

"David when you are done bringing the Turkey in I would like a word in the den," my mother stated. It was not given as a request, but her tone was not hostile if anything it sounded sympatric.

The den was a small room toward the front of the house, a bit isolated. Mom was sitting on the short sofa or love seat as I entered there were several chairs in the room, but she indicated that I should sit beside her. So I took a seat beside her when she turned to me our knees nearly touched. She took both my hands in hers I felt the cool comfort of those hands so familiar when I was young.

"David what is going on—you don't seem to be yourself. If you are having a problem I and every other member of this family are here for you."

She said this leaning in--looking me straight in the eyes awaiting an answer, perhaps a request for assistance or guidance. A mother talking to a troubled son hoping to afford the comfort he needed.

"What could be wrong I have a loving and supportive family—A FAITHFUL wife and two DEVOTED daughters." I let the emphasis of the words I used sink in. My mother is no dummy; she heard what was unspoken.

"David, an HONORABLE man, supports his wife in the things she needs. It is part of being a good husband that you make sacrifices, just as your good wife has sacrificed so often for you the last twenty years."

My mother was a very intelligent woman. She immediately understood that I was not the clueless fool I had been taken for, and she had her comeback. It was a smart appeal to the essential goodness and fairness that she had instilled in me as a child, those values that we take from our parents, and cultivate by our personal conduct. I could see from her point of view that it was a matter of commitment by a man to his marriage and family. It was an odd case of her completely misjudging her son, for this error I was totally to blame. I had mislead everyone for so long that they no longer knew me. I was not the good reliable man they believed me to be. I wore the costume of the hapless husband and father, a man to be taken advantage of because of his own good and loving nature. Her approach could never work on the man I am, but she could not know the sleeper had awoken to a new world where technology revealed all secrets and human corruption prevails.

"Thing is I don't see having a whore for a wife as honorable. Admittedly all things are for sale; we sell ourselves for what we desire and it is not always money. In fact, it is rarely the money even when the money changes hands. Nevertheless, not all are bargains are dishonorable. Some we make before God. We make our pledge and asks a blessing. True we don't always keep our word, but trying has to be a part of it. Otherwise, a woman may end by kissing her son goodnight with lips still warm from her infidelities."

At that last line, my mother jumped back as if I had slapped her, up to that point she had been ready to continue the argument. I saw her emotions play through her eyes: surprise, shame, anger and finally pain.

"David what did you say?"

"I said your kisses when you came home from your adulteries were an abomination."

She let my hands drop and ran from the room. I didn't need a phone to hear Doris' words of distress as my mom came running out of the den.

"Mom what's wrong?" Doris cried.

She must have been waiting for my mother's nod to ambush me, this was apparently a planned kind of intervention possibly all the family were planning to hit me over the course of the day.

When I exited the den no one was around, my mom had apparently fled to the kitchen dragging the other available member of the family with her. I decided a strategic retreat was in order for me and exited out the front door as quietly as I could. I still had the keys to Doris' Mercedes so I took a drive over to the State Park to the Hendrik Hudson Lookout, the lover's lane from my youth. It had taken me until the end of my senior year to get a girl up here and then I did not get very far past first base. I was and am no Casanova. Still when I was twenty-five and a freshly minted law grad, women were looking on me quite differently, unfortunately, I was hooked by then. Doris had me and was not letting go.

When you looked at my situation, it was two sides of the same coin. When Doris wanted me, I was expected to fall in line. Now that she was looking elsewhere I was asked to and expected to fall in line again by letting her have the freedom I had been denied. Oddly I could see the logic. Doris had sacrificed far more than I for the marriage. She had made it work. She had raised the next generation, if left to me we would probably never have had kids, bought a house, planned a retirement or contributed much of anything.

Now what Doris wanted was some, as she saw it harmless fun. A bit of what she had missed. She didn't deny me the same opportunity she just did not believe I could take advantage of the offer. You see I am old and fat.

My Mom's good intentions today were to make me see my limitations, but convince me that they all still loved me and would make it as easy as possible on me. They were being kind as they saw it, and I was being selfish. In a way, I had known all along that it would come to this. I am not blind or stupid, but Mom and Doris are right in many ways I have remained a child. Unfortunately, I have not remained childlike. I am corrupt. I have seen the way the game is played and dropped down into the dirt to play. I kid myself that I did it for others or that it was a necessity. It wasn't I cheated because I wanted to win and more for the sake of winning than the money. Giving in to Doris would be losing, and I had going on twenty years of losing to Doris.

Parking at the overlook, I pulled out my iPad and opened up my spyware.

"He's nowhere in the house, and Mom's car is gone," I heard my daughter Beth say.

"With any luck he won't come back," I heard Anne, my brother-in-law Larry's wife, interject.

I always knew Anne did not like me at least now she had a reason. Anne is a real hottie. She isn't exactly beautiful, but she oozed sex appeal and she has what is referred to as a bedroom voice with the flirtatious manner to go with it. I understood why Larry, Jr. who is not the sharpest tool in the shed had married her, but it was a stupid move; this woman virtually broadcast her infidelities. Larry ignores the not too subtle gossip and his wife's rather blatant behavior. My brother-in-law worked as a vice president at his family's bank. It was obvious nepotism but rather acceptable in that industry. His fat paycheck and social position assured that no matter how hard Anne played she always came home after for the comfortable lifestyle.

Anne and Larry had a five-year-old son who had the same blond hair and blue eyes as his alleged Dad. As a couple, they always seemed to get along. Now as I listened my mother hatched a scheme.

"My son is more than obstinate. He virtually called me a whore to my face," my mother informed her audience.

"I don't believe it," my mother-in-law said. "Dave is too nice a man for that."

"I am having trouble believing it, and I heard it, but hear it I did. He seems to know it all somehow. The old men must have been careless in what they said, and he has taken thing totally out of context," dear old Mom explained.

"What are we going to do, I don't want to lose my husband," Doris said.

"We need to be crafty. If he doesn't come willingly, we need to use some subterfuge," my mother said.

"I don't know we should not underestimate my brother. He was always the shrewd one. Not the smartest, but the cleverest. Remember what he did to Uncle Jack in the poker games he can be very clever," I heard my sister say.

She was referring to the time when as a teenager I discovered that my Uncle cheated rather consistently in our biweekly poker games. Everyone knew it but did nothing about it considering we played for pennies. Still I was not happy being cheated, so I figure out how he was stacking the deck when he shuffled and cheated him back. For weeks he lost continually, but could not expose me without exposing himself. The games came to an abrupt end, and my Uncle stopped speaking to me. My sister remembered because she asked me what Uncle John's problem was, and I laughed when I told her.

"Yes but he has a weakness we can exploit," my Mom said.

She then laid out her scheme. The weakness she referred to was my inability to tolerate alcohol. I am no drinker, but I am a happy drunk that is until I fall asleep. Give me enough booze, and I will pass out.

Mom's plan was simple get me drunk at the family New Year's Eve party. As they spiked my drinks, Anne would come on to me. When I was happy drunk, she would start making blatant advances that I would certainly remember when I sobered up. When I was so far gone that I had no idea what was going on, and, therefore, would not remember, they would get me upstairs to a bedroom and get my clothes off. Take a few pictures of a naked Anne and myself and in the morning. I would wake to find myself in a strange bed to be confronted by an irate wife.

When I was presented with the proof of my infidelity, I could hardly object to my wife's proposition that we open up our marriage to others. Of course, opening our marriage meant that Doris would have the right to play while I stayed home. The big stumbling block seemed to be Anne's reluctance to do anything actually sexually with what she described as an old fat man. My lack of sex appeal was the universal opinion. Anne was the best choice. Since Larry was such a good friend of mine, the guilt factor would be increased. And after all she did not actually have to do anything just get some suggestive pictures, to help with this scheme they picked my Brother Samuel's wife, Elaine. She was a mousy little thing, who was afraid of her shadow. She was pulled into the plan by her desire to fit in. She was also the perfect witness being the newest member of the family married only two years to my brother and pregnant at the moment.

From the front seat of my wife's expensive car, I looked out over the Northern Catskills where Washington Irving had set Rip Van Winkle. It is an odd view in winter mist moving through dark mountains. The Hudson River is a silvery strand to the east. It is a good setting for Irving's folktale, but no place to listening to your marriage die.

But then Doris spoke up.

"We need to give Dave another chance— more time," she said

"What about Mark will he wait?" her mother asked

"Mark is very anxious. We are both off this week and well it's the perfect time for as he puts it—TO GET A ROOM. However, I want my David, he is my first and true love. I am going to have it out with him. He has never denied me anything, and I can't see him completely denying me with this. He and I need to reach an understanding." she said.

"Look my plan will work. It is harsh, but your husband has earned this with his attitude. I suggest you may talk some more but be careful don't keep your lover waiting any longer because of my stupid son," my mother pronounced.

"I'm going to give Dave one more shot to step up, "Doris said ending the conversation.

There was nothing for it but to go back and sit through Christmas dinner with the family. I got a very cool reception from everyone except Anne apparently resigned to the need to flirt with the old fatty. Doris grabbed me and pulled me out the door and toward her Mercedes.

"What about Christmas Diner," I said.

"We're not attending. We need to talk," she said.

"Is there something to talk about," I asked.

"Yes but not in the car," she said with a little-wicked smile.

She drove to the Hilton. She had called ahead and booked a room, and when he got there, the White Star Champaign was already waiting.

"You remembered," I said.

"How could I forget, it was my first time after all."

"Is this the last time?"

"Not if I can help it—please Dave, talk to me."

"What is there to talk about?"

"This," she said advancing to me she wrapped her arms around my neck and pulled me into a prolonged kiss. From there it was a short step to the oversized king bed.

She when down on me not the usual occurrence these days. She had learned through the years how to use her tongue and mouth to give a blowjob. When I tried to return the favor, she pressed me back down.

"This is your time," she said.

"But-"

"No Buts, I am pleasing my husband the man I love above everyone else," she said.

There was no help for it she intended to suck me dry, and she did it. After I came in her mouth, and she swallowed every last drop, she wasted no time in getting me hard again. She mounted me and began an agonizing slow fuck. She had my number she could literally keep me on the edge of orgasm as long as she liked. Bringing me almost there, and then holding me back. I knew she enjoyed her power, but got little sexual gratification for her from the slow pace.

When at last she released me, and I had a mind-boggling orgasm she wanted to talk.

"What wrong love," she said.

"What could be wrong?"

"Oh, please stop, this is not us, I love you I will always love you. I want to be with you forever, till death do us part just as we promised."

"Forsaking all others?"

"You know that I can never love another, Use yes—love no," she said.

"Is there really a difference?" I said.

"Of course! I am trying to assure that we stay together—Inseparable forever," she said.

"You can keep a bird in a cage, but don't leave the door open."

"What does that mean? I am offering each of us freedom because we love each other, that is what binds us I will not fly away," She said, "Please won't you believe me."

"I do, but you have it wrong,"

"No trust me I can love only you," she said.

I had no answer she was missing it failing to understand the other side.

"Please don't let some male pride issue hurt us. We are only talking a bodily function it means nothing."

"Dee please believe me this is one argument you cannot afford to win. Be happy with what you have, I will keep my side of it. Just do not open the door."

"Don't be stubborn. You know that I will always take care of you as I always have. You need me don't be foolish," she said.

I took her in my arms realizing that there may be no future for us. She could not understand we were mostly all a lie. Yes, the lies were omissions on my part, a failure or inability to speak the unattractive truth. I had gone nineteen plus years avoiding the central issue in our marriage until Doris believed in the original lie she told herself and that I had never challenged.

"Oh, I love you—It will be alright— trust me," she said not understanding that she was not the problem.

"No trust me I will never accept what you are offering. I have kept my side of the bargain," I said ending the discussion.

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Wednesday of the following week Mark took my wife to his place for lunch. I listen only long enough to assure that they had done the deed ending my marriage. Apparently by some mutual agreement the loving couple made no mention of the cuckolded husband. It was as if I did not exist.

Friday was New Year's Eve. I started off drinking at my favorite watering hole the Irish Mist. It's a restaurant bar arrangement. I invited all my oldest friend by for a drink, but none of the family members. I stayed strictly with soft drinks. I didn't arrive at Larry, Jr.'s house until 8 P.M. and then by taxi. My old Honda was parked earlier that day some distance away from Larry's and was, hopefully, unseen. When I arrived, I smelled of the bar I had been in most of that day, and acted a wee bit worst for the drink.

I was soon provided with some very strong drink. They started slow but quickly moved up the intoxication level. I had a hell of a time disposing of them, but fortunately Anne and Larry believe in potted plants. They and a few trips to the bathroom allowed me to stay sober as I acted drunk.

Anne asked me to dance and didn't wait for a response but pulled be to my feet and proceeded to rub herself against me. I let her do her worst and after a while responded in as drunken a fashion as I could. The cue seemed to come about a half hour after the ball dropped in Time Square by then I was pretending complete inebriation. Must have been convincing as Anne and Elaine each took an arm and began helping me up the stairs.

Reaching what I assumed to be a guest bedroom they dumped me on the bed.

"Get his closes off while I undress then you can take the pictures," Anne told Elaine.

I let Elaine begin she was rather tentative unbuttoning my shirt and removing it.

"You know he's not really fat—in fact, he's rather buff," Elaine said.

"Whatever just get his pants off already," Anne said having dropped her dress neatly over a chair and let down her hair as she stood there in her sexy silk underwear.

As Elaine tried to undo my belt, I spoke up.

"Don't think I want you doing that unless of course Anne there is going to actually have sex with this old not so fat man," I said.

Elaine jumped back a look of surprise on her face.

"FUCK—FUCK—FUCK," Anne swore.

"My sister warned you, but who listens in this family," I said.

"Now the two of you get downstairs and send the cheating cunt who calls herself my wife up here."

"Now before I fuck you both for the hell of it," I said

With that, they ran from the room with Anne only stopping long enough to grab her dress.

It took what seemed like a long time while I sat there listening to the commotion below. There were some raised voices, but I didn't even try to overhear, the listening part of this little drama was over. Eventually, Doris appeared at the bedroom door.

"You wanted to see me?" she asked.

"Yes come in and sit down," I said in as soft and friendly a voice as I could muster in the circumstances.

Doris sat down, and the tears started flowing. The waterworks were completed when her nose began to run. She was so sorry and had made a terrible mistake listening to others.

"What are you sorry for Doris wanting another man or fucking with him last Wednesdays at his apartment?"

She gave a shriek at this and for the first time I saw fear.

"No maybe it's just that my mother's scheme didn't work and now you are caught good?"

"Please David I love you it doesn't mean anything you have to believe that. I know that you love me and will forgive me," she said perhaps she was a little taken in by how calm I was.

"No Doris I don't."

"Oh, please David forgive me and let us get past this."

"Oh, I forgive you Doris there is really nothing to forgive except a little misguided deceit. Problem is with the rest of it. You see I don't love you never have--guess I never could."

"You don't mean that David it's your anger talking."

I could not help, but laugh. "Do I seem angry? Let me assure you I am not. I have spent the last nineteen plus years locked into this marriage. It wasn't all bad. It was a gilded cage of sorts, but now the door is open, and I am walking through that door with gratitude to you for finally setting me free."