Love Potions Don't Exist

"Common aphrodisiac," Renardo assured him.

Preston shook his head and continued. "Bring ingredients to a boil," he read. "Lower heat to a simmer for five minutes, then add cranberry juice, red ginseng, and...what the fuck?"

"What?" Renardo asked.

"Skunk balls!?" Preston shouted.

"Oh, right," Renardo replied. "Yeah, kinda strange, but an important ingredient. Fresh ones too. And believe me, they were tough to get."

"How did you even...," Preston began. "You know what," he said, reconsidering, "never mind. I don't wanna know."

"That's probably for the best," Renardo agreed.

"Hey guys!" London chirped happily as she entered the kitchen. With a pang, Preston remembered the previous day. He hadn't seen her around the house at all since she stormed out of the living after hearing that embarrassing audio that he had of her on his phone, and he suddenly remembered that he felt really bad about it.

She grabbed herself a root beer out of the refrigerator and sat down on a stool right beside where Preston stood at the counter. "Hey London," he began. "Listen, about yesterday, I-"

"Oh don't worry about that!" London interjected.

"What happened?" Renardo asked.

"None of your business, Booger Face," London replied with a snarky tone.

"It's Booger Lips!" Renardo corrected heatedly.

"Right...sorry," she said.

"Are you sure?" Preston asked.

"Totally!" London said, patting him affectionately on his back.

"Because I can delete the-"

"Don't worry about it!" London assured him. "I've been thinking about it, and you're right. It's really funny to hear me say those things out of context. Keep them! It'll be really funny to go back and hear those again one day."

Preston looked at her sideways and studied her face. Surprisingly, she genuinely seemed like she was okay. "Alright...," he began slowly. "As long as there are no hard feelings."

"Of course not!" she replied happily as she stood up. "Now if you ladies will excuse me, I've got a math test to study for."

"Yeah, I should get going too," Renardo said.

"Don't forget your truffles in the living room," Preston reminded him.

"Not likely," Renardo replied.

"Wait, those are yours?" London asked.

"Yeah," Renardo said.

"Barf, I feel sorry for whoever gets those," London said with disgust.

"You know, you could try being nice to me every once and a while," Renardo replied with a tone of annoyance. "For all you know, lots of girls would want to get a Valentine's Day treat from me."

"I'm sure they would," London said with a smirk. "But that's not what I meant. Sorry to say this, but I tried one on my way in. Tasted strange. Like...fish or something. Hope you kept the receipt." Preston and Renardo exchanged looks of panic. "Anyway, see ya'," she said as she bounced merrily from the kitchen.

In a flash, Preston had crossed the room, grabbed Renardo by the collar of his jacket, and slammed him up against the wall.

"Dude!" Renardo exclaimed.

"You irresponsible bastard!" Preston said through gritted teeth.

"What!?" Renardo replied.

"What do you mean 'what'!?", Preston said angrily. "You've just fed my sister a poisoned candy!"

"It's not poisoned, Preston!" Renardo said defensively. "It's just a love potion, that's all. She'll be fine!"

"Love potions don't exist, idiot!", Preston yelled. "And she better fuckin' be fine," he contunued, releasing his grip and taking a step back. "If she's up all night vomiting, I'm gonna save it all in a bag and shove your face in it tomorrow."

"Dude, that's really gross," Renardo said as he straightened his jacket back out. "Besides, you saw the ingredients," he continued. "It's all safe and normal."

"Skunk balls, Renardo," Preston said simply. "Skunk balls."

"Organic skunk balls," Renardo corrected.

"Get the hell out of my house, Renardo," Preston said angrily.

"Sure thing," Renardo replied. "But hey, let me know how she is tomorrow. This will be a good barometer of how successful it will be with Chelsea."

Preston gave Renardo a threatening look. "Right, sorry," he said as he grabbed his box of candy out of the living room and headed out the door.

Preston thought for a moment. He wanted to make sure his sister was going to be okay, but also didn't want to alarm her that she had just eaten a homemade skunk ball truffle. He decided to go upstairs to her room and check on her discreetly, hoping not to tip her off that something might be wrong.

"Come in," she called out as Preston knocked on her bedroom door.

"Hey," he said as he stepped into her room.

"Hey yourself," she replied. She was sitting on her bed with her math textbook and several notebooks laid out around her.

"So...whatcha doin'?" Preston asked awkwardly. He didn't often come into her room like this.

London looked up at him, then back down at the books and papers surrounding her, then back up at him once more. "Um, schoolwork?" she replied with a hint of annoyance in her voice.

"Oh," Preston said. "Cool."

"Shouldn't you be studying too?" she asked him. "We have the same test tomorrow, you know."

Preston peeked over at her open textbook. "Nah," he said. "Logarithms are pretty straightforward to me."

"Hmm, well I'll keep that in mind if I get confused about something tonight," she said. She kept looking at her notes for a while as Preston stood there. After some time, she looked back up at him. "Can I help you with something, weirdo?" she asked.

"Just seeing if you're feeling alright," he replied as he sat down on the edge of her bed.

"Why?" she asked suspiciously.

"No reason," he said. "Just seeing if you've got any dizziness or fatigue going on."

"Excuse me?"

"Yeah, you know with flu season coming around and everything, just wanted to check on you. Any nausea? Body aches? Scratchy throat?"

"What are you-"

"Runny nose? Chills? Anal leakage?"

"Ew!" London exclaimed.

Preston leaned forward and placed his hand flat on his sister's forehead. "You seem alright, I guess," he said.

"At least one of us does," she replied. Preston scooted over and sat right next to her, taking his hands and placing them at the back of both sides of her jaw.

"No swollen lymph nodes," he uttered under his breath. He stared into her eyes. "Pupils seem normal," he said.

"If you start unbuttoning my shirt, I'm calling Dad in here," she said to him as he felt her hands for signs of clamminess.

"No need," he replied, standing up. "I think you're fine. Just let me know if your mouth gets really dry or you start feeling signs of vertigo or something."

"What the hell is wrong with you, Preston?" London asked.

"Nothing!" he insisted, still not able to shake his concern about what she had just ingested. "Just wanna make sure you're feeling alright. In fact...do you need me to sleep in here with you tonight?"

"Why on Earth would I need that?" she asked.

"People have died in their sleep from vomiting on their backs, you know," he said. "Drowned in it or something."

"I think it's time for you to leave, Preston," London said simply.

"Fair enough," he said. "I'll come back and check on you in a little while."

"Please don't," she replied.

Preston shut the door on his way out, feeling at least a little bit better about her situation. He knew he still needed to check on her every once in a while, but as it stood at the moment, it seemed as if Renardo's truffles were safe.

***

Throughout the night, every couple of hours or so, Preston got out of bed and tiptoed down the hall to his sister's room, listening for signs that she was still breathing. The first time he went, he was able to crack her door open very slightly so that he could hear her more easily. Thankfully, each time he checked, he could clearly hear the sounds of her breathing peacefully in her sleep.

His alarm went off at 7:00 in the morning, just like it did every school day. He was exhausted from being up so often in the night, but nonetheless found the strength to get out of bed. He decided to go check on London one more time before he started getting ready for school.

When he got to her room, he noticed that her door had been shut all the way once again. "Hey London," he said with a light knock before turning the knob and entering. "Just wanted to check and make sure - oh shit, sorry!" he exclaimed as he diverted his eyes. London had been right in the middle of getting dressed. Her jeans were thankfully already completely on, but other than that, all she had on was a lacy black bra that looked as though it did very little to cover or support anything at all. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have just come in like that!" he continued.

"That's okay," she replied. Preston thought it was odd that she didn't sound annoyed or angry at all.

"I just...just wanted to see if you minded if I took a shower first," he lied, still keeping his eyes from looking her way.

"I don't mind," she said sweetly. He glanced briefly in her direction, hoping that she had put her shirt on by now, but looked away quickly once he saw that she was still standing there wearing her bra, making no apparent effort to cover herself up.

"Okay great," he replied. "Well...I'm gonna go now," he said as he quickly backed out of the door.

He felt relieved that she still didn't seem to have any side effects from eating that candy. He figured if it was going to make her sick, it would have done so by now. Feeling the burden of his sister's physical well being lift off of his shoulders, he went across the hall to their shared bathroom and hopped in the shower.

As hard as it was for him to admit to himself, London's breasts had looked quite nice in that black lacy bra. He knew that she had always been somewhat "gifted" in that particular area of her body, but never allowed himself more than a second to think about it. Now that he had gotten a better look at her, however, he found it slightly more difficult to push those thoughts out of his mind. That, combined with the sudden realization that he had been "cleaning" his cock for a minute or more, was enough to quickly snap him back into reality. He rinsed the remaining soap off of his body, turned the water off, and pushed the shower curtain aside.

"Jesus, London!" he cried out as he quickly pulled the curtain back to cover his naked body, leaving his head exposed so he could still see out. His sister was sitting on the sink and facing him, still in her bra and jeans, as if she had been waiting there for a while for him to get out. "What the hell are you doing in here?"

"Hey," she said simply, staring at him with a look in her eyes that Preston had never seen on her face before.

"Um...hey?" he replied, trying not to look at her cleavage. "Can you leave please?"

"Nuh-uh," she said with a smile.

"Are you being serious right now?" he asked. "Is this some sort of payback for this morning? Because I swear to you that was an accident. I didn't sleep well last night, so I was a little delirious when I just barged in your room. I'm sorry, okay?"

"Oh, I didn't mind," she replied, still smiling brightly at him. She leaned back on the sink, pushing her breasts out further as she did. Preston's eyes grew wide.

"You sure? 'Cause it sure seems like you minded. I'm guessing that's why you're fucking with me right now, right?"

"Fucking you?" she said, raising one of her eyebrows in an oddly enticing sort of way.

"Umm...no," Preston said. "Fucking WITH me, I said." He dropped his eyes quickly down to her chest and then back up to her face. "Why are you still not wearing a shirt, London?" he asked.

"Can't decide what to wear," she said. "I was hoping you'd come back to my room and help me decide."

Preston was very confused. "That's...that's not something we've ever done," he said simply. "Could you at least throw me a towel so I can get out of here?"

"Mmmm...okay then," she said, grabbing a small washcloth on the sink beside her and tossing it to him.

"Not exactly what I had in mind," he said. "Seriously, London, what the hell's the matter with you? Why are you being so weird right now?"

"M'not being weird, am I?" she asked as she hopped off the sink and moved closer to him.

"You're being EXTREMELY weird!" he replied, gripping the shower curtain tighter. He felt extremely vulnerable in that moment.

London stopped right in front of where he stood, leaving only the thin cloth of the shower curtain that separated her from his nakedness. "Just wanted to spend a little time with you this morning before we left for school." She stood up on her tiptoes

and pushed her nose right up beside Preston's neck, inhaling deeply. "You smell really good, Preston," she said, batting her big blue eyes and looking straight into his.

"Well, that's soap for ya'," Preston replied. "Makes things smell good."

"Hey kids, you up yet?" their mother called out from somewhere in the house.

Preston began to panic. "Okay, seriously London, can you PLEASE leave?" he begged. "I don't know what's going on right now, and I don't know why you're doing this, but I really don't want Mom or Dad to see us like this right now. It would be so awkward. I mean, it already is awkward, but even more so. So can you please leave now?"

London smiled. "Anything for you, big brother," she replied with another bat of her eyes. "See you at breakfast." She glanced down in the general area of his crotch, causing Preston to take his free hand and cover himself, even though the shower curtain was covering him anyway. He watched her leave the bathroom and shut the door. As fast as he could, he bolted for the door and locked it quickly.

"The fuck was that!?" he said to himself as his heartbeat finally began to slow down again. He dried himself off, brushed his teeth, and slowly opened the bathroom door. He looked out into the hallway and, not seeing anything unusual, walked quickly to his room with his towel wrapped around his waist. It was something he had done numerous times before, but given his sister's weirdness this morning, he felt very exposed in the moment.

He half expected to find his sister waiting for him in his bedroom, but thankfully, that was not the case. He closed and locked his door and began to get dressed. Just when he thought all was normal, he opened his underwear drawer and found a black, lacy bra laying neatly on top of his boxer shorts.

"Jesus, London!" he exclaimed to himself, picking up the bra and holding it out in front of his face. Did this mean that his sister was topless somewhere in the house? He pushed that image quickly out of his mind, threw the bra across his room, and got himself dressed.

When he got downstairs, his dad and sister were already sitting at the table eating breakfast while his mother busied herself around the kitchen.

"Morning Preston," his dad said to him from behind his newspaper.

"Hey, Dad," he replied. It was the year 2022, and Preston was convinced that his father was the last human remaining on Earth that actually still read a newspaper.

"You're moving a little slow this morning, aren't you?" his mother asked him as she fiddled around with the coffee pot.

"I guess," he replied, looking over at London to see her smiling coyly at him.

"What would you like for breakfast, dear?" his mother asked him as he took his usual seat at the table across from London. "Eggs and bacon? French toast? Oatmeal?"

"I'm fine, Mom," he replied. "Just some juice, I think."

"Eggs and bacon it is then," she said as she began to cook his breakfast. He should have known better than to not give her the answer that she was looking for.

His dad was comically hidden behind his giant newspaper, only his hairy knuckles in sight. While his mom had her back to him from the stove, he looked across the table to London. "What is your deal?" he mouthed to her as she stared brightly at him. She winked at him and brought her hands up to the top of her polo shirt. The top two buttons were undone, as they would have normally been, but in that moment she went ahead and opened up the remaining three buttons, exposing a considerable amount of her cleavage. Preston pointedly looked down at the table.

"So listen guys," their mother began as she finished preparing Preston's breakfast. "You know that business trip your father has this week?"

"The one to San Francisco?" Preston asked, keeping his head down.

"Correct," she replied. "Well, he and I got to talking last night, and we decided that there was no reason at all why I couldn't come along with him."

"Oh yeah?" Preston asked.

"Yeah. You know, with his work being so hectic and all, your father and I don't get to spend as much time together as we like."

"Oh, okay," Preston replied. "Well...good for you guys then, I guess."

"So anyway," his mother continued, "that means, starting tonight, you guys are going to have the house to yourselves for a week."

"Oh really?" London asked with a strange tone in her voice.

Preston felt a jolt in his chest and quickly looked up. He saw that London was staring at him with a sort of crazed expression, twirling her blonde hair around her finger.

"Um...are you sure that's such a good idea, Mom?" Preston asked shakily. "I mean, you sure we're gonna be alright here?" He gulped loudly. "Alone?"

"Well gosh, son," his father chimed in, his newspaper still completely covering his face, "you and your sister are eighteen years old now. Are you telling me that you can't make it a week without us?"

"Don't worry, Dad," London said. "We'll be fine. I'll take real good care of my brother," she said with a hungry expression.

"Good girl," he replied from behind his paper, reaching his hand out blindly to pat her hand. He missed the mark and ended up giving her scrambled eggs a fatherly pat, seemingly not noticing his error.

"Yes, you'll be fine, dear," his mother said as she brought his plate of breakfast to him. "Just keep the place clean and don't have anyone over. Except Renardo, of course." She looked towards London as she walked back towards the kitchen and stopped. "London, you missed a few buttons there," she said to her before walking away once more.

"Sorry Mom!" she said as she stared Preston in the eyes and slowly re-buttoned her shirt.

After breakfast, their parents hugged them goodbye and began getting themselves ready for their trip.

"Bye guys!" London said to them. "Ready for school then, Preston?" she asked.

"Sure," he said hesitantly. Before he knew it, London had grabbed his hand and began leading him to the door.

"Aw, isn't that sweet!" their mother said as she watched them walk hand and hand out of the kitchen. "You guys are just too much!"

Once they left the kitchen, Preston pulled hard on London's arm and took her to the living room.

"Not so rough, big brother!" London said as he forced her to sit down on the couch, carefully taking a seat as far away from her as possible.

"Twin brother, London," he corrected.

"You came out first," she said.

"Whatever. Listen, can you stop now?"

"Stop what?" she asked sweetly.

"This...this charade that you have going on!" he replied. "Why are you doing this to me? Is it some sort of sick joke?"

"I don't understand," she pouted. "I'm just showing you how much I love you, that's all."

"Love me?" he replied. "Since when do you say that you love me?"

London shrugged. "Dunno," she said. "All of a sudden though, for some reason, I just really, really, REALLY wanna show you how much I love you, you know? I can't explain it, but I can't control it either. It's like a switch has flipped for me overnight, and now I just can't seem to get enough of you."

"Overnight?" Preston repeated slowly. He suddenly felt like he was going to vomit as it dawned on him. It couldn't be, he thought to himself. He wouldn't allow himself to even begin to consider the possibility that those stupid truffles actually worked. But then, as his sister crawled into his lap, letting her legs hang down on the other side of him and looking lovingly into his eyes, he knew he had to consider it.