Ob-la-di

She began to sob brokenly. "I don't care," she wept. "Call the police! I'll let them arrest me, but as soon as I get out I'm going to come back here again. You can have me arrested a thousand times and every time I get out of jail I'm going to come back here until you talk to me. Please, Des; just let me talk to you. I'll do anything you want me to if you'll let me talk to you!"

"Okay," he said. "We'll go in the house and talk. Then I want you to go away and never come here again. You said you'd do anything I want you to. That's what I want you to do."

"Okay, if that's what you want, that's what I'll do," she sobbed.

He walked to the door, opened it for her and she walked in. He sat on the sofa and she got a kitchen chair and pulled it up in front of him. She started to reach for his hand and he pulled it away. "Don't touch me," he said.

Her hand returned slowly to her lap and she looked up at him miserably. "Desmond, I'm dying inside," she said. "I miss you so bad it's killing me. I miss my kids. I know I don't deserve it, but I'm begging you for mercy."

"Maybe you should have thought of that while you were fucking some sleazy guy for a record contract," he said bitterly.

"Yes, I should have. I was drunk, Desmond. It was right after a show and I was drunk. You know how horny I am after a show."

"I've been drunk and horny, too," he said. "I came home and fucked my wife, not some slut in a bar. Why didn't you fuck Rachael or Janet? You know I let you do that. Did someone force you to get drunk? Did he rape you?"

"No," she sobbed. "I know it was my fault. I'm not trying to make excuses. I wanted that record contract so badly I threw everything else I had away. There is no excuse for what I did. I know I deserve everything you feel about me. I'm just asking for mercy. I can't offer any excuse. I can't give you anything but my need. I need mercy, Des. Can you find it in you to be merciful to me?"

He sat in silence for a long time. "Not now, I can't, Molly. I hurt too bad. Maybe in a few weeks, or a few months or a few years. I'm sorry. No, what the hell am I saying? You're the one that did this. What do I have to be sorry for?"

"Nothing," she said. "You never did anything but love me. It's my fault. I'll do anything, Des. I'll even go away and leave you alone. Please let me see my kids. I won't if you don't want me to, but I need to make this up to them. I think I'll kill myself if you won't let me. Please Des, I'm desperate. I have no one. My mom won't speak to me. Janet and Rachael barely tolerate me. I need something, someone that doesn't hate me."

"Maybe you can find a record producer," he said.

She just sobbed. "I know I deserve that. Please, Des; let me see my children."

"They don't want to see you, Molly and I won't make them," he said. "Haven't you done enough to them? They're just starting to get back to normal. I won't keep them from seeing you if they want to."

She reached out to him and then drew back. "Thank you, Des. I won't forget this."

"That's just the problem, Moll; I don't believe a word you say. 'I won't forget this,' but somehow you managed to forget that you had a husband that worshipped you, kids that thought you were the queen of the world and friends who loved you. Don't bullshit me. I swear to God, if you hurt those kids again I'll take them and move to Tahiti. You'll never see them again."

"Des, I made one mistake. I'll spend the rest of my life regretting it. Have you ever made a mistake?"

"Yes, I fell in love with you," he said bitterly.

She buried her face in her hands and collapsed in her chair, weeping hysterically. "I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm so sorry," she said over and over again, like someone trying repeatedly to open a lock with the wrong key.

"What can I do?" she sobbed. "Would you like to beat me? I'll let you and I won't say a word. Do you want to fuck around? I'll let you and I'll never complain. Just let me be part of your life, I'm begging you. Do you want to fuck Janet or Rachael? They'd do it in a minute. I'll ask them for you. What can I do, Des?"

"I'm not a slut," he said. "Jesus Christ, Molly; do you think I never had a thought about sleeping with other women? Do you think I don't think our friends are hot? Well I do, but I'd never fuck them because I loved you. I love our kids and I respect myself too much to do that."

"I'm just telling you I'll do anything," she said. "I know what I had and what I lost. If I can get the kids to take me back, will you let me come back home? I won't touch you, I swear, unless you want me to. I'll never go anywhere without you or them. I'll hire detectives to follow me. I'll go to counseling. I'll go to church. I'm trying to repent. If you let me come back I'll make you trust me again. Desmond. I know I have to make it right. I've been going to church three times a week. I'll never touch an instrument again if that's what you want. Janet and Rachael won't play with me, anyway. I'll never take another drink again as long as I live unless you want me to. Just tell me what to do and I'll do it."

"I want to think," he said. "The kids are going to be here in a minute and I don't want them to see you. I'll let Janet or Rachael know what I decide. Don't come back here until you hear from me. Do you understand?"

"Yes, will you let me try to set something up with the kids?"

"Yes, but if they don't want to, that's the end of it."

"Yes, I promise. I'll go now. Thank you, Des. You'll never regret it, I promise."

"Your promises don't mean shit to me," he said. "Don't promise me anything."

"No, I won't," she sobbed. "I'm going now."

"Wait a minute," he said.

He went and got her a towel and she dried her tears gratefully. He held out his hand and she gave it back to him and left without another word.

Two days later, Mandy came and pulled her chair up close to his in his office. "Mom wants to talk to me," she said. "Rachael called me and asked me to talk to her. Do you think I should?"

He looked at his little girl with tears in his eyes. "Yes, I think you should, baby. She's still your mother and a girl should have a mother in her life. I think she wants to try to make it up to you. Give her a chance, Mandy. You'll never regret giving people another chance. I know it's hard after they've done something horrible to you. Believe me; I'm struggling with that every day. I think you're a bigger person than me. Go talk to her."

"Thank you Daddy," she said. "I miss her and I still love her. I don't want you to think that I'm not loyal to you, though. I don't want you to think I'm not on your side. I just miss her so bad."

"I know," he patted her head. "Give me a hug."

She threw her arms around him and they cried a little bit. She went off to do her homework and he turned back to his computer. He was researching mercy. He had come up with a definition. "When you withhold from someone the punishment they deserve." He had found another word that went along with it. The word was grace. "When you give someone a gift they don't deserve."

He was struggling mightily with those two concepts. The next day, Janet came and picked Mandy up after school. She was gone for four hours, and when she came home she didn't want to talk. "I need to think," she said. "I'll talk to you tomorrow after school. I'm going to try to talk Dray into seeing her."

"Okay, baby; if you think that's best I trust you," he told her.

When she came to the store after school she sat beside him again. "Daddy, I talked a long time to Mom," she said. "She's suffering. She deserves to suffer, but I can't be the one to make her. I want to be cruel to her, but I can't. It hurts me too much."

"It's okay, baby," he told her. "I understand. What do you want to do?"

"I want Dray to talk to her and then I want you to let her come home."

He groaned. "I was afraid you were going to say that. It's so hard for me, Mandy. Every time I look at her I want to strangle her."

"I know, Daddy. I think we just need time. I was really mad at her at first. I tried to hit her when she told me. Janet grabbed me and wouldn't let me. Now I just hurt inside when I look at her. I just can't believe she would do this to us. Remember when I cheated on that test and got caught? I think this is like that only a lot worse. I knew it was wrong when I did it. I just wanted to get an A so bad that I didn't pay attention to myself. I was very disappointed in myself that I was that kind of person. I think Mom feels like that, too. You didn't make a big deal out of the test thing. I knew you were disappointed in me, but you loved me and you forgave me. Do you still love Mom?"

"Yes, baby. That's what makes it hurt so bad. I've tried not to love her, but I do."

"Then let her come back and live with us. Punish her and get on with your life. I'm going to forgive her and I hope you will, too."

"I'm not as brave and good as you," he told her. "It may take me a long time."

"That's okay, Daddy. I'll help you. Any time you want to talk to me, I want to talk to you. I love you and I want you to be happy."

He could hardly talk around the lump in his throat. "Thank you, Mandy. I love you, too."

Dray went to talk to his mother the next day and he was much easier to placate than his sister had been. He really didn't understand what was going on except that his mother had done something really bad. His young mind was malleable and he only knew he wanted his mother back.

Desmond called Janet and told her he wanted to meet Molly at their house. She and Rachael kissed him and went out, leaving him alone with Molly.

"Well, you talked the kids around," he told her.

"I don't know about Mandy," she said. "I know she still doesn't trust me."

"That's your fault," he told her. "Do you want to come home, Molly?"

"Oh, please, Desmond. I want it more than anything," she begged. "I know I have a lot to prove. I'm going to... no, I said I wasn't going to make any promises to you. You wouldn't believe me anyway, would you?"

"You made sure I wouldn't," he told her.

"Yes, I know. I'm sorrier than you'll ever know. I know what I had, Des. I know I threw it away. What do you want me to do?"

"I want you to be your kids mom," he said. "I want you to apologize abjectly to Rachael and Janet and beg them to take you back. I want you to start playing again. I'll even play with you. I want our lives back to normal."

"Will you sleep with me?" she asked.

"Yes, but that's all it's going to be for a long time," he said. "Maybe forever. It makes my skin crawl to think about touching you, Molly. Maybe I can get over that. We'll see. I'll go to counseling with you. I'm going to forgive you. It's going to take me a while. Can you live with that?"

"Yes, I'll take anything you'll give me. I'm so sorry, Desmond. I know what I did. I had a perfect life and a perfect man and I threw it all away for a fucking record contract. I want you to know something though. I didn't feel anything but ashamed when I was doing it. I was disgusted with myself and with him. I thought I was going to puke. You're still the only man that's ever made me cum and the only man I've ever wanted to be with. I needed to tell you that. I just want you to know that I love you. I always will and I'm yours whenever you want me. If you never do, I understand. I made it like that and I'll take the consequences."

"One more thing," he told her. "You're going to stop apologizing. I know you regret it. You've shown me how much. You're not going to make up for anything either. I'm taking you back because I need to. It's for me as much as it is for you. You don't deserve it, but I didn't deserve all the happy years we had either. Nobody wants what they deserve, least of all me. Do you understand?"

"Yes, you're having mercy on me. Thank you, Desmond."

"Pack up your stuff," he said.

She jumped to her feet and hurried to gather her things. On the way home, he reached out and held her hand. "We're going to survive, Moll," he said.

"Ob-la-di," she smiled up at him with tears in her eyes. "You took me by the hand."

Nine years later he stood beside Mandy in the record office as Molly, Rachael and Janet signed their second recording contract. Molly looked over at him triumphantly and he gave her the thumbs up sign. Mandy gave her a fist pump and she smiled happily.

They still had their problems. Two years of counselling, countless long talks until the wee hours of the morning and constant work by Molly to repair his broken trust had gotten them through. Desmond still had trust issues. Molly had hired that detective. He didn't watch her all the time, but randomly, so that she never knew when she was under surveillance. The detective filed a report every six months with Desmond. He had never opened one. Molly looked at them. She never drank in public and she made sure that only Janet and Rachael were ever alone with her after playing until she could get home to Desmond. She took one of her children with her everywhere she went if possible and one of her friends if not. She didn't trust herself for a long time. Her life was an open book to Desmond and she saved every text she got, along with her recent calls and insisted on showing them to Desmond until after a year and a half he forbade the practice.

"I can't live like this, Molly," he told her. "Either you're going to keep your promises or you're not. I'm going to believe everything you tell me until I find out differently. I'm going to trust you until you make a fool out of me. I don't expect you will."

He was very proud of her that day. Nine years of proving herself had made the difference.

She walked around the desk and rubbed herself against Desmond. "I'm so horny," she whispered. "I can't wait to get you home."

He laughed and held his beautiful wife in his arms. "Do you think Rachael and Janet are horny?" he teased.

Happy ever after in the Marketplace

Desmond lets the children lend a hand

Molly stays at home and does her pretty face

And in the evening she's still singing with the band.