The Long and Winding Road

“Did anyone tell you exactly who was taking advantage of the great deal I’m offering this month?” I asked with some trepidation.

“You told us about it at the party this spring, remember? Have you had any takers yet?” questioned a confused Dorothy.

It was pretty obvious that Dorothy and Ben knew almost nothing about my burgeoning enterprise. As I recalled, Dorothy had referred to me as an insulting prick!

“Dorothy, believe me, I’d love to see those big tits of yours bouncing around while you rode me cowgirl style, but the rules have been modified in my favor. They’ve been adjusted to three nights you’ll owe me, and you’ll sleep with whatever guy I select, no questions asked. Ben won’t be banging Sherry, but he will get a reasonable replacement, but only for one night. Take it or leave it.”

“You really are an insulting prick!” reiterated Dorothy before noticing her husband’s expression. “However, we’ve been looking into invigorating our sex lives and this seems like a good fit. We’ll agree to your conditions, but you’d better be worth it.”

“Wrong attitude, Dorothy. You’re the one that needs to be worth it,” I replied casually. “Let me call Marla and see if she has time to come over and let Ben take her for a spin. If she does, we’ll go upstairs and get it on.”

Marla was more than willing to come to my house and try out a new guy, so I found myself in Dorothy less than an hour after she rang my doorbell. There was something special about taking three generations of a family to bed. It occurred to me as I fondled Dorothy’s sizable hooters that I’d have to be careful not to assign Stewart Santori, or any of Brooke’s friends to Dorothy. On top of that, I could never offer Gladys or Brooke to Ben. It would be the ruin of my entire scheme!

It had been a week since Sherry left and I still hadn’t heard from her. I decided there was nothing to say, so I didn’t call her. Work was almost unbearable, but we were very close to perfecting our revolutionary software, and a big pay day loomed in the near future.

Happy clients are the best advertising, and the number of people interested in my services continued to increase. I met with three couples over the weekend and took on all three.

One was a mom and her son. He was eighteen and was leaving for the Marines in a couple of weeks. He was a bit shy and was still a virgin. His mother, Alice, felt her son should have some sexual experience before boot-camp. I set him up with Marla, thinking she’d be understanding and patient with the kid. I was exactly right. His mother was so happy when he enjoyed his first time so much; she promised she’d fulfill her obligations if her son could spend as many nights with Marla as possible before he left. Marla only owed me two more nights. When I explained the situation to the kid’s mom, she suggested she bang Marla’s brother, Glenn, a few times to get more of Marla’s snatch in my pussy account. There was a mom who loved her son!

Every time Carl had sex with Marla, Alice owed me three more nights. Every time she slept with Glenn, I gained three nights from Marla, who in turn slept with Carl giving me three more nights from Alice. It was really snowballing into a sweet situation for me. The more Glenn and Carl got laid, the more pussy I put into the bank. I calculated that Marla would owe me seven nights and Alice fourteen within a week if they kept screwing at the same rate, and I tapped them each a time or two. Of course I sampled Alice quite a few times, just to keep her from getting too far into debt.

Bill, from Sherry’s work, became a regular, and Glenda seemed fine with it. She was one lady I could use with all of my male clients without worrying about family histories and connections. Glenda really seemed to enjoy the variety and she was a stone cold fox. Every male in the group was more than happy to draw her in my little pussy lottery.

Nancy became very popular with the guys, as well. She had a great personality and was almost always available when I needed her. Jensen was a total ass, but his sexual appetite placed Nancy under my control for weeks to come and she was delighted with the attention.

Gladys was my go-to girl when Bill, Jensen or Glenn wanted some sex and the other ladies were otherwise occupied. While she was not the guys’ first choice, she was eager to please and very experienced, so they never complained. All the men enjoyed their time with Alice. She was an almost forty year-old widow who was more than willing to uphold her end of the bargain she had agreed to for her son. I was under the impression that she enjoyed the agreement even more than Carl.

The scheme began to grow almost exponentially. The more happy clients I had, the more word of my venture spread. Before long, I had far more available pussy than I would ever be able to enjoy. I was spending an hour a day keeping my spreadsheets accurate and up to date. Oddly, I was also feeling increasingly lonely. I came to realize sex is a great pastime, but it really isn’t a substitute for a solid relationship.

It was three full weeks after Sherry went to help her sister when Mr. Blake summoned me into his office. Nancy gave me a big smile, winked and pulled her blouse down far enough to give me a glimpse of her left nip before quickly covering it back up.

I was feeling relaxed when I stepped into the boss’s office. Things got even better in a matter of minutes.

“We completed the deal, Jim! Here’s a bonus check for your great work and all the extra effort you put in,” stated Blake cheerfully.

I glanced at the check and saw it was for fifty fucking thousand dollars! It made me wonder how the hell much he got for that piece of software.

“I sold it for a cool fifty million,” said the boss with a chuckle at my surprised look. “The really cool thing is we’re also getting a royalty. Every time our program is downloaded, the company will get a penny. I know that doesn’t seem like much, but it adds up pretty quickly, especially given how sought after the program’s going to be. I’ll have that royalty split evenly among the five of you that worked on the project. You’ll get a check in the mail every quarter.

“I made enough money on this deal to be far more than comfortable the rest of my life. Since Brenda died two years ago, work has been my only interest. I’ve convinced myself to get back in the game.

“To that end, I’ve been asking Nancy the reason she’s been so cheerful lately and why she’s altered her style of dress. She told me all about your side venture.”

“My Ponzi Pussy Scheme? It began as a way to even the score when Sherry told me she wanted to experience other lovers before she became too old,” I explained as a sudden inspiration struck me. Blake’s wife, Brenda, had died a couple of years ago and he was apt to be horny as hell by now.

“I have information stored on the cloud. May I use your computer to pull it up? I think you’ll be quite impressed,” I predicted.

Two hours later, I left the office with two checks. One was for fifty thousand dollars for my bonus. The other check was for a cool three quarters of a million dollars! Blake had agreed to buy out my Ponzi Pussy Scheme, or PPS, as it had come to be known! He told me that he had millions of dollars more than he could ever spend, so he offered me a hefty sum to assume command of the PPS.

I drove carefully to the bank and deposited my checks before calling my financial adviser to make an appointment. He agreed to see me the next afternoon.

“Why are you here?” asked Sherry three days later.

She looked even more incredible than I remembered. She was holding her three year-old niece, who had chocolate splashed over her little face.

“I wanted to see you,” I replied slowly as I took in her beauty.

“You want to laugh at your whore wife? Serve me with divorce papers? Tell me how much nicer Glenda’s tits are? You’re a vindictive bastard, you know that?” responded Sherry as she put the little girl down so she could return to watching Sesame Street.

“Why do you think I want a divorce?” I asked, not wanting to admit it was part of the master plan I hatched what seemed like years ago.

“I figured it out when I talked with Nancy that morning. She told me how much shit you’d be taking at work for the swap with Jensen and how she had never guessed you’d be the type to agree to other men sleeping with me.

“It was a wake-up call for me. I had gone along with your scheme because I thought I was making you happy with all the extra-marital sex you’d be getting. I even pretended to be happy to sleep with those old men, that pimply faced kid, and the Pillsbury Doughboy. I did that so you wouldn’t feel guilty about me while you got your rocks off with those women,” insisted Sherry.

“Nancy got me thinking about the whole situation. Why would you do a total 180 and decide to let me sleep with men when it was exactly the opposite of your normal personality?”

“I was just letting you try your wings…”

“Bullshit, Jim!”snapped Sherry. “Part of your grand scheme was to divorce my cheating ass, wasn’t it? You knew you’d never be able to let me have a lover on the side. Your pride and sense of loyalty wouldn’t allow it. Once you knew you’d have to divorce me, you hatched your fucking scheme so you could come out on top. You used my faith in you, as well as my cheating ass, to benefit you!”

“You’re taking the high road here?” I asked incredulously. “You’re the one who told me you wanted to break our vows and have sex with other men. I’d call that a deal breaker!”

“The thing is, I told you!” replied Sherry. “Did you tell me you planned to divorce me if I went through with that stupid idea? Did you tell me you were so upset you were going to toss my ass to the curb?”

“I did tell you it was a bad idea and it made me question your love and devotion,” I pointed out.

“You never said ‘Hell No’ to me, Jim. You never told me that you’d throw my ass to the curb if I ever tried shit like that,” replied Sherry. “When you told me about your damn scheme, I thought you were willing to let me experiment and that you just wanted to try some strange pussy. I had no idea you had already decided to divorce me. I made a really stupid decision, but I was honest and up front about it. You’re the one who lied. That’s on you. You get to share in the destruction of our marriage, although I admit I started the ball rolling when I asked if I could have a lover.”

“So, do you have many lovers now,” I asked with some restraint.

“You prick!” snarled Sherry. “My sister’s upstairs in bed, close to losing her baby. I’ve been taking care of two wonderful children, cooking, cleaning, shopping, and driving to the doctor’s while you’ve been fucking Glenda, Nancy, Marla, and God only knows who else. I haven’t had the time or energy to even masturbate since I got here. Mom went home after the first week because Dad said he wasn’t feeling well. We both know it was mom’s way of avoiding staying here and working so hard to help Sis.”

“How about we go out for dinner or something,” I suggested much to the surprise of Sherry.

“Have you not been listening?” asked Sherry angrily. “I’m busy as hell and I’m not going to let you set me up to destroy me. Just give me the damn papers!”

I opened my brief case and took out some papers and handed them to her. She briefly glanced at them and then took a longer look. She shook her head in wonder.

“You want to list our house for sale? What the fuck are you up to now?” she demanded. “Splitting our assets before we divorce? Are you trying to screw me over?”

“I heard you transferred to your company’s facility down here. You have no intention of going back to Middleburg, so why would selling the house bother you, Sherry?”

“Because it symbolizes we’re giving up on our marriage. I think it was a pretty good one, at least before I had my brain fart. I’d even made the mistake of thinking we’d start a family pretty soon. I just thought I should experience a little more before committing to a family. That was a huge mistake, not that you needed much reason to toss me out,” added Sherry in a low voice.

“Would you like to go look at that white house two blocks down from here on Vine Street? It has room for a big family,” I offered.

“Don’t tell me you’re thinking of moving down here with Glenda! Please don’t do that to me!” pleaded Sherry.

“Glenda doesn’t figure in any of my plans,” I replied. “I am going to move someplace in the area and I’d like your opinion on that house.”

“I looked at it a couple weeks ago when the realtor had an open house. My opinion is it’s a beautiful home in a really great location. It’s on an oversized corner lot, has a nice pool, four bedrooms, and is way out of your price range, even if we sell our house for a decent price. You’d only get half the equity, which is barely enough for a down payment,” Sherry asserted.

“We’re still married and anything I buy would be half yours, so I thought you might want to look at it with me. If you’ve already looked at it and don’t want to look again, I’ll understand.”

Sherry stared at me for a few seconds. “You can’t afford it, Jim! Get that through your head. Even if you managed to finagle my half of the equity in our house away from me, you’d be over $450,000 short. Why is that so hard for you to understand?”

“If you’ll sign the papers to list our home, I’ll buy that damn house and you’ll own half of it. If you want a divorce, I’ll buy out your half, but I’m hoping you’ll consider moving in with me and filling it up with kids.”

“What about Glenda? What about the guys I slept with? What about all those other sluts you entertained so well? We’ll just forget it ever happened?” Sherry responded with some emotion.

“We really can’t forget it happened because living in that house will be a constant reminder,” I admitted. “The fact we’re both so reluctant to return to Middleburg will be another reminder. Not totally trusting each other may serve as a reminder of how we fucked up so badly.”

“Are you saying you want me to go back to being your wife?” asked a stunned Sherry. “If you are, describing all the things that will remind us of how dumb we were is not the best way to approach it.”

“Sherry, you really hurt me when you told me you wanted to sleep with other men. I thought we were doing great until we suddenly weren’t. That was a damn rotten thing to do.

“That said, my PPS was despicable on so many levels. I did lie to you. I gave up on our marriage when you asked about sex with other men, and that was wrong. I should have kicked your ass, threatened you with bodily harm, or at least told you that I’d divorce your ass. Instead, I dreamed up a way I could capitalize on your sex appeal, which is considerable, and took advantage of you and that shapely ass and those perfect tits. I gave up on you far too easily.”

“Suppose we did get back together. We still wouldn’t be able to afford that house you’re talking about. It’s absolutely perfect, except it costs way more than we could ever afford, especially since you must either be unemployed, or about to be,” reasoned Sherry.

“Our software development was a big success, Sherry. Blake gave me a $50,000 bonus. Then I sold him my interest in the PPS for $750,000. Add in the equity we have in our old house and we’ll have well over eight hundred grand. That house is listed at $550,000, but I bet a cash offer of $475,000 would buy it.”

“What about the men I slept with? Will you forgive me, or will you hold it over my head the rest of my life?”asked my beautiful wife.

“That depends. Are you done with that shit now, or will you be stepping out on me every chance you get?” I asked, tossing the ball back into her court.

“Jim, I’ll never even look at another man, and I’ll cut your balls off if you so much as look at another woman, no matter how beautiful she is and how nice her ass and tits are,” promised Sherry. “Will you accept those terms? Your balls will belong to me.”

“You drive a hard bargain, but we have a deal. I really missed you.”

“Yeah, I bet. You sold PPS to Blake for $750K? That’s incredible! Exactly how many women did you screw?” asked Sherry.

“The thing to keep in mind is your little kitty was the foundation for the whole venture. Helen of Troy’s face may have launched a thousand ships, but that sweet little pussy of yours launched $750,000 our way. That’s a lot better than prime pussy. It’s got to be platinum, at the very least!” I declared in hopes she’d forget her question

Sherry studied me closely, looking into my eyes for a long time. Finally she nodded slightly and gave me her megawatt smile. There are things spouses are better off not knowing. It’s especially gratifying when they realize it, and Sherry did.