There Goes the Neighnorhood

After the game, the guys politely thanked me and left. Aubrey said what I was thinking when they left. "I had more fun when it was just us," she said.

"I did too," I admitted.

"They probably think I'm a slut," she said.

"They're really nice guys," I said. "They're just weirded out because you're a girl watching football. That's rare and special."

"It's nice to have someone think I'm rare and special," she said.

"You should have seen the reaction you got from Jay," I laughed.

"He no longer gets an opinion on how I act or what I wear," she said. "What did you think?"

"Oh, we're late," I said. "We'd better get to the meeting. Are you ready?"

"Let's go," she smirked. "But we're not done with this conversation, yet."

We walked next door to her house. She opened the door and we went in. Jay, Wally, Bart and Iris were sitting around the dining room table. Jay was really pissed. Aubrey walked right by him and smiled. "That was really cold," said Bart. "You know we always watch the game together."

"Yeah, Jay's TV sucks," said Wally. "This wasn't fun at all. We need to get past this and get back to normal."

"Finding Normal isn't always easy," I said quietly.

"Who were those guys?" asked Bart.

"They're some of the guys I work with," I said.

"They're really nice guys," smiled Aubrey.

"Why are you dressed like a slut?" screamed Jay. He'd finally lost his cool. Aubrey hadn't sat down yet, neither had I. As Jay jumped to his feet she ducked behind me and I glared at him, waiting for him to make a move.

"Barry, this is wrong," he said sitting down again. "Can you see this? You know how badly I've been suffering. You're my best friend. You're the guy I should be turning to about this."

"Jay, I WAS the guy you turned to about this. I was the moron who helped you pay for the PI who followed Aubrey around when we thought that she was cheating on you. I was the idiot who calmed you down and made you feel better when she first started acting the way she has towards you. Isn't that what I did?"

He nodded. "I did all of that because that's what best friends do," I said. "Best friends don't fuck each other's wives for a year. They don't continue doing it until they get caught and then start acting like they're the fucking victim.

"It was a terrible thing to do," he said quietly. "And it was the worst mistake I've ever made. It cost me a lot of time with my wife. It's nearly ruined my marriage and it messed up our friendship. I've almost destroyed our whole neighborhood. All I can say is that I'm sorry."

"Too little, too late," said Aubrey coldly.

"Aubrey, he loves you," said Iris. Aubrey just let her head fall back releasing a torrent of tawny curls. Her laughter lightened the mood in the room.

"What do you know about love?" asked Aubrey. "You cheated on the best guy I know. How can you even stand to let that word pass your lips?" Iris started to talk and then just clamped her lips shut.

Aubrey kept talking. "I'm sorry Iris. This probably confuses you. Whores don't understand romance or commitment. Sluts have no emotions except lust. Skanks don't know anything about love."

Aubrey stepped out from behind me. "Tell me Iris, do you know how badly it hurts to watch your husband, the man who swore to love and honor you, sneaking off to screw some fat assed slut when he could be with you?"

Aubrey turned and looked at Jay, then back at Iris. "Nope, you don't do you? But you will soon. Well not the fat ass slut part, but all the rest."

"If you and my worthless, lying, cheating husband want our marriages back you're going to have to have a dose of what we felt. Neither Barry nor I want to sneak around and tell lies to you two for a whole year. We're just not that cruel. But Barry and I are going to go out on a bunch of dates. Probably..." she hesitated.

"Five or six," I supplied.

"I was going to say twenty," she continued. "Any way, we're going to go out and do whatever we want. We may or may not have sex on these dates. You two do not get to say a word about it. If either of you so much as breathes hard during the time that we're dating, we add one and start all over again."

Aubrey came over and sat down on my lap. She put her arm around me and laid her head on my shoulder. Iris jumped up and screamed "Get away from my husband you little bitch."

Aubrey got up and started laughing. "What's so God damned funny?" asked Jay.

"Barry and I have never even kissed each other," said Aubrey. "This game may never end. We're already up to six or seven dates now and we haven't even gone out yet."

"That didn't count," said Iris. "I wasn't ready."

"I wasn't ready to see my husband humping a baby elephant either," snapped Aubrey. "Remember you and Jay don't have to do this. We can just get great lawyers and go for the divorces now. Maybe Barry and I could go out on those dates afterwards anyway."

"What about the rest of us?" asked Wally.

"Yeah," chimed in Bart. "Are we all friends again?"

Even Aubrey looked at me. "Neither of you has anything to offer me," I said. "We'll see how this goes, though. Maybe there'll be deals for both of you as well."

Aubrey smiled and held on to my arm. Doing that was becoming a habit of hers. She took my arm and wrapped it around her shoulders, staring straight at Iris as she did it.

"This seems like a nice night to go out for a drive in that car of yours," she said.

Jay set his jaw harder and Iris bit her lip so hard that blood beaded up on it.

"I'll go change into something more appropriate for driving," she smiled.

"I'm not getting upset," said Jay, with a big fake smile plastered on his face. "I just have a question. Is this a date?"

"Of course not," said Aubrey. "This is just me going out for a drive with a friend."

"Then why can't you and I go out for a drive in my Camaro?" asked Jay. "You've never set foot in my car."

"Jay, are you upset?" she asked, in a very caring tone.

"Yes, I am," spat Jay.

"Ooh that's got us up to eight or nine dates now," she smiled.

"What?" shrieked Iris, angrily. "But you said that this wasn't a fucking date!"

"Nine or ten," chirped Aubrey. "The rule was that you two wouldn't say a word during the dating period. Even though this isn't a date, the dating period has begun."

Iris badly wanted to say something but she held her-self back. She raised her hand as if she was in school. Aubrey nodded at her.

"So you mean to tell me that you can spend as much time with my husband as you want whenever you want until this is over?" asked Iris.

"No, I can't" said Aubrey smiling. "I'd want all of his time. But I can spend as much time as he'll allow me."

"No," said Iris. "We're not doing this."

"Shut up you fat cow," snapped Jay. "I don't like it any more than you do, but I'd rather let him have her for a little while than lose her forever." Iris glared at him.

"But don't you see it you fucking moron? If we let them do this, we'll never get them back. She's had a year to make up her mind and she's done with you. You deserve it. You're just a fucking horn dog. She'll be much better off without you. Barry, on the other hand, is still in shock. But if he starts dating her, I'll lose him."

Aubrey cut in. "Okay, then the deal is off. Barry can you give me the name and number of that divorce lawyer you found?"

"Okay, wait," said Iris. "I guess if we do this, at least I have a chance. I'll agree but only on the condition that the two of you have to talk to us. Barry has to talk to me and you have to talk to Jay."

Now it was Aubrey's turn to bite her lip, but she agreed. She nodded her head to confirm it.

"And the two of you have to speak to us as well," added Jay.

"What the hell are you talking about, asshole?" I spat.

"He wants you to talk to him and for Iris and me, to talk to each other too," said Aubrey.

"No fucking way," I said. "It's bad enough I have to talk to her. I'd rather call the whole thing off. We're already bending over and spreading for them. We're giving them all kinds of God damned choices when they didn't give us any. They're asking too much."

"Whatever," said Jay. "Do you think that this is easy on me? Losing our friendship is actually worse than when Aubrey stopped talking to me. At least then I had you to help me through it."

"Fucking over people has consequences," I hissed. "Are we doing this or not?" Both Jay and Iris nodded their heads.

"I guess I'll have to go for our drive like this," said Aubrey. "We've talked away all of my changing time." She held out her arm to me and we left. A few moments later we'd backed my car out and were heading for the freeway. It was a beautiful night and the moon was high in the sky.

"Do you think they bought it?" I laughed.

"I'm pretty sure they got the idea," said Aubrey.

"It feels pretty good to give them a taste of what we felt," I said.

"Mmm, okay," she laughed. Aubrey seemed happy. And she looked at me as if she had a secret. She snuggled in and wrapped my arm around her as we drove home.

Every year my company has its end of the year party on the first weekend of December. It follows our year's end performance reviews and we hold a big formal dinner for all of the employees. All employees from the CEO to the groundskeepers are invited, but attendance is mandatory for the management team.

When Iris and I got home from our first appointment with the marriage counselor she'd found, the invitation was in our mailbox.

Actually she found it before I got home, since we'd driven in separate cars. "Oh God," she said. "I hate going to these fucking things worse than anything else. And this year they haven't even left me enough time to get a dress and really diet for it."

"Don't bother," I said.

"Why not?" she asked. "It's mandatory for you to attend. It would be terrible for you to go alone."

She was smiling. Even though I had promised to speak to her, this was the closest we'd come yet to a civil conversation. Even in our therapy sessions, I'd refused to give anything other than monosyllabic answers. Iris saw this as a way for us to begin the healing process.

"I'm not planning on going alone," I said. "I'm going to ask Aubrey." Iris looked really hurt. For some reason, it didn't bother me. Actually her pain seemed to make me feel better.

"You're probably glad that you don't have to take the fat girl this time," she said.

"Actually, Iris, every year before this one, I've begged you to go with me," I told her. "I've always been proud to show you off. And you know it. As I recall it, last year they almost caught me sucking your boobs in the coat room. Remember what we did when we got home that night?" Her face lit up with the memory, then immediately fell at the thought of me going with Aubrey.

"So why can't I go this year?" she sobbed. "I'm your wife no matter what Aubrey thinks. Why are you taking her?"

"Because I wouldn't have to worry about finding Aubrey in the middle of a gangbang," I snapped cruelly. "I still have to worry about what you'll be doing while I'm gone though. And then there's the fact that I do have to start dating Aubrey sometime."

"Can't we get past this?" she asked. "Why can't we just put this behind us? This isn't the way things are supposed to be. Don't you see that? This isn't what I wanted at all. I want you, Barry."

"It isn't what I wanted either," I said. "I had the perfect life. I had a beautiful wife who I loved with all of my heart and who I thought loved me. I had friends who I thought had my back no matter what."

"Damn it Barry. We can have it all back," she said.

"I wish," I said quietly. "But it was all a lie. Iris, everything we had was a lie. Everything you've always told me was a lie. It began all the way back before we were married. When you gave me the, "I've grown out of being a slut," speech, I took you at your word. You told me that you only acted that way because you were lonely and you didn't have anyone who loved you. Well Iris, I loved you and I never went away. But you were lying then and it just made everything we have a lie. If I'd known that you weren't being honest with me, I never would have married you."

"And my great friends aren't any better. The guys I thought were behind me no matter what. I guess being behind YOU or maybe in your behind was just more important. There's no going back."

A week later, I'd just finished putting on my tux when Iris came into the room and looked at me. There were tears in the corners of her eyes as we walked next door. The thought of me dating Aubrey was killing her and she deserved it.

As I stepped onto the porch, the door opened. Jay ushered us in. He saw Iris crying and nodded at her. He tried his God damnedest not to even look at me. I snickered loudly. As I walked into Jay's living room, I saw that Wally and Bart were there. Kristy was there with Bart.

"Damn Barry, you clean up really well," said Kristy. "Have you been thinking about me? I'll certainly be thinking about you after this."

Iris glared angrily at Kristy. Before she could say anything, Aubrey came slowly down the stairs.

When I saw her, I forgot how to breathe. Starting from the top, Aubrey had changed overnight. We'd just seen each other last night for one of our evening drives, but this was a different Aubrey.

She'd gotten her hair styled differently. It was incredible. Her hair was swept back on the left side and it curved around her left ear and fell in soft waves on her shoulder. The right side draped down curtain-like, so you couldn't see the right side of her face. It was very playful and called attention to her face. It just made you want to see more of that face. She looked like a modern day version of Veronica Lake.

Her dress was a beautiful shade of blue. Her shoulders were totally bare and her back was naked, all the way to her waist. The bottom part of the dress, I guess you'd call it the skirt, was tight over her hips and outlined her butt. It went down to mid-calf and really emphasized her legs and lower body. I wondered how she'd be able to walk until I noticed that there was a split on one side that went all the way up to her waist in the front. Every time she moved one of her beautifully shaped legs came into view.

As she turned around the guys were speechless. Kristy let out a long whistle.

"Are you wearing any panties?" asked Kristy. "That dress is so fucking tight that I'm surprised you can breathe. There should be a line somewhere. Even if you're wearing a thong we should see something."

Everyone, especially Jay, looked at her. "Barry will know by the end of the evening," she said smiling. "Maybe he'll tell you." As she spoke, Jay, who had been gripping the armrest of his chair so tightly that his knuckles were white, suddenly ripped the armrest off of the chair.

"Why don't you dress like that for me?" he asked.

"I only dress like this for the guys I'm going to fuck," snapped Aubrey. She was still twisting the knife, even now.

I remembered the corsage I'd bought her and just looked at her. The top of her dress barely contained her boobs. I wondered what was holding it up. Surely she wasn't expecting me to pin this thing on her.

"Don't be shy Honey," she said. "You're going to have your hands on them pretty soon anyway. They're not as big as what you're used to."

"But they're probably a lot firmer and definitely shaped better," said Bart.

"Thank you kind sir," gushed Aubrey.

"Fuck you Bart," hissed Iris.

"Never again," said Bart. "That's why we're in this God damned situation now. You have to learn to keep your legs closed."

Wally was still staring at Aubrey. I don't think he realized that we could hear him. "Jay was out of his fucking mind to cheat on that," he said.

I had the best time ever at the dinner. Aubrey was breath taking. My co-workers all wanted to know who she was and where I'd met her. Only a few of them even knew that I was having problems in my marriage. Of course, my football buddies had already met her and had told everyone about her over the past few weeks, but few were ready for the reality.

Aubrey seemed to be having a great time too. After the dinner, there was dancing. I'm not a great dancer but we got plenty of attention. Aubrey was asked to dance several times and refused them all. "He gets really jealous," she told them. "He really doesn't like to share his toys."

Back in the car on the way home, things heated up. "So are you ready?" I mistakenly asked her.

"I've been ready for weeks," she said. "Did you have some place in mind? Your car is tiny inside. I've heard of teenagers doing it in the backseat, but I don't think both of us will even fit back there."

"I was talking about tomorrow," I laughed.

"The curtain finally goes up on the real show," she laughed. "This will all be over soon. Debbie is so pissed at Wally that she can barely stand to look at him. I really wish that we could do Wally first, just so we could end her pain."

"I wish that we could do Iris first, so we could end MY pain," I said. "I checked the cameras. Did you know that she gave him a blow job yesterday?"

"I no longer care about that horn dog's sex life," she said. "I'll just be glad when he stops following me around trying to get me to play with his little pee-pee. Besides we need to worry about our own sex life."

"Aubrey, you are far too special for just a quick roll in the hay," I smiled. "You're the kind of girl who should be..."

"I'm not nearly as special as you think," she said running her hand over my crotch. "I'm just a normal girl. Don't start trying to make me into something I'm not. And you can roll me anywhere you want, in the hay or anywhere else."

"Aubrey, I'm being serious," I said.

"I am too," she said, putting her hand over my mouth to shush me.

"When this bullshit is over, I want us to end up together," she said. "So I need to claim you before that bitch Kristy tries to."

"Aubrey, Kristy is as big a slut as Iris is," I laughed.

"Nuh Unh," she said. "Kristy is much thinner than Iris." I couldn't help laughing.

"I really don't have panties on," she said.

As we pulled back in the driveway and I walked her up to the door, every eye in the neighborhood was on us, as usual. I pulled her into my arms and kissed her. I'd intended just a quick peck but Aubrey had other plans. She wrapped her arms around me and pulled me in.

Our mouths locked together hungrily and she molded herself against me. Almost too soon, we pushed away from each other as Jay opened the front door like a father checking on his teen-aged daughter. Aubrey and I barely noticed him there. A line had been crossed between us. I'm still not sure how I managed to walk away from her that night but we both knew that things had changed.

As I walked into my house, I noticed Iris sitting in the kitchen. I looked at her and smiled.

"How was she?" she asked angrily. "Is she better in bed than I am? I really don't think she is. Jay told me that she's kind of boring. I may not be as pretty as she is, but I'm a much better fuck. I'll do things she never even dreamed of. I'd do anything you ever wanted to try if you just gave me the chance."

"If she's that terrible in bed, then why is Jay so desperate to get her back?" I asked.

"He loves her," snapped Iris. "He can't get over her, the same way that I can't get over you."

"If he loves her so much and you love me, then why were you sucking his dick yesterday?" I asked. She looked scared. "We have cameras all over both houses," I said. "This whole thing will be over soon."

"But..." she started.

"Iris, just save it," I said. "We really don't care. Aubrey and I were just trying to give the two of you a chance to get us back. I guess you guys need sex more than love. You're going to be one lonely old woman someday." I left her standing there crying.