Someone to Love Us

"What's wrong with me, Bleys?" she wept. "What happened? Why doesn't he love me?"

"There's nothing wrong with you, sweetheart," I told her. "You're gorgeous, smart, sexy and amazingly sweet. It's him, Malina. He's an asshole. It has nothing to do with you. Trust me, honey; there are a million better guys in this city that would cut off their right arm to be with you. You just fell in love with one of the ones with his head up his ass. I'm just thankful you found out now instead of later. Honey, in two weeks you're going to be back, better and stronger than ever. I know that your heart is breaking, but you have bunches of people who love you. I love you and Paul loves you and Bill and Sahara and Molly love you. We think you're one of the special people in the world."

She smiled up at me through her tears. "You're right," she said. "I am special and screw him if he doesn't think so." The bravado went away and she sobbed again. "I loved him so much, Sahara." Sahara hugged her and kissed her tear stained cheek.

"I know you did," she said. "Let's just get you home and get you a hot bath and something strong to drink. You're going to be okay. You're the strongest person I know, Malina. We're all lucky to have you in our lives."

"Thank you," she smiled weakly. "I'm lucky to have you guys, too."

We got her home and Sahara ran her a hot bath. They stayed in there for a long time and Malina came out in a robe. She sat beside me on the sofa and curled up against me. "Bleys, would you mind staying for a while?" she asked.

"No, I don't mind," I said. "Sahara, can I call you a cab? I'll call Fredrick and get him to pick you up from Alicia's, okay?"

"That's fine," she said.

I called the cab and we talked for ten minutes or so. The desk called and said the cab was there, and Sahara kissed me and got her things. She was behaving oddly but I didn't think much about it. She stopped and looked back at me from the door. "Bleys, I love you," she said.

"Love you, too, baby," I said. It looked like she was crying when she turned away.

I stayed until about nine thirty. Malina had crying spells for a while, but she was a little drunk and she had gone to sleep before I left. I checked on her one more time and she was sleeping soundly, just a little ball under the covers.

When I got home, I knocked on Sahara's door, but there was no answer. I thought they might already be in bed, so I went to bed myself. I waited in the lobby for them the next morning until we were late. I tried calling her cell and it went straight to voicemail. I called the suite phone and no one answered. When I went back up and opened the door, it was quiet inside and the lights were off. I went into the bedrooms and their closets were half-empty and their personal things were gone. I noticed that the things that were left were things that I had given them.

I had no idea what was going on. I went to work totally perplexed. Maria told me that Sahara had called and taken some personal time and wouldn't be in. At 10:30, I found myself waiting for Molly to walk through my door, but it stayed shut and a terrible sadness began to settle over my heart. At noon, just as I was becoming desperate, Alicia walked in without any warning and stood with her legs apart like a gunslinger in front of my desk.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" she nearly shouted.

"What are you talking about, honey?" I asked. "I don't know what you mean."

"Don't call me honey," she stormed. "What did you do to her? What did you say?"

"Who, Alicia, what did I do to who? I swear to God I haven't done anything to anyone. I haven't said anything either. Are you talking about Sahara? If you are, she's disappeared. I didn't do anything. The last time I saw her was at Malina's place last night. She was acting oddly, but I thought she was just concerned about Malina. The last thing she said to me was that she loved me and I told her I loved her. I knocked on her door last night but no one answered. I waited for them this morning but they never showed up. She took some personal time, but I have no idea what's going on. Have you seen her? Have you talked to her?"

"Yes I have," she was still angry. "She came to get Molly last night and she was crying her eyes out. I finally pried it out of her that you were going to leave her. What did you say? She just said she was taking Molly and leaving. What have you done?"

"I swear, I didn't say one word about leaving her. I have no intention of leaving her. I'd rather die than hurt that girl, Alicia. I want to spend the rest of my life with her and I have never said one word or done one thing to make her think any differently. I don't know what's going on but it pisses me off that you think I'm that kind of guy, Alicia. God, that hurts."

The angry look went away. "Why does she think you're leaving her then? I'm sorry, Daddy. It hurt me to think you'd do something like that to those precious girls. What happened?"

"Nothing happened," I said. "That's what I've been trying to tell you. I have no idea what's going on. Do you know where she went? I need to talk to her and find out what the hell put that idea in her head."

Alicia sat down in the chair in front of my desk. She was lost in thought for a while and I was thinking hard myself. What on earth had happened to make her think I was leaving her? I scrutinized every second we had spent together and I just drew a blank.

Alicia sat up suddenly in the chair. "Oh my God," she said, "the wedding! It was the wedding! She saw that asshole didn't show up. She saw how Malina collapsed and it scared her to death. She ran away because she was afraid that you'd do that to her. You know how little self-confidence she has. You know she has these terrible trust issues. That's what happened. She couldn't bear the thought that you would leave her, so she ran away. We've got to find her, Daddy."

"How?" I asked. "I have no idea where to start looking."

"Neither do I, but Bill does," she said. "Call him up here."

We had a full-scale conference in my office in half an hour. Bill did know where to start. He pulled her personnel files and made copies of all her information and her picture. We all got on the phone and called all the contacts listed. Bill called five different detective agencies and paid them enough to drop whatever else they were doing and start looking for Sahara and Molly.

We put secretaries to work calling every hotel in the city asking for her room. It took us nine days to find them. One of the secretaries finally struck pay dirt. They were staying at a Best Western in Woodbury. I sent one of the detectives out to keep an eye on them. We were quite the troop going out to Woodbury. Malina insisted on going because she felt partly responsible. It was ridiculous, but I couldn't convince her otherwise. Cloe, Alicia, Bill and Helena, Paul and Maria were all in one of the company limos as we drove out. Fredrick was driving and I dropped them at the IHOP in Huntington Station.

I talked to the detective who was watching them and he told me that they were walking back to the hotel from a nearby convenience store. Fredrick located them and they stopped and looked when the limo pulled up to the curb beside them. I just sat there for a moment, mustering up my courage. A lot was riding on what was about to happen. I opened the door and stood up.

Molly screamed when she saw me and came running to throw herself into my arms, sobbing out her heartbreak into my chest. "Why, Bleys," she sobbed. "Why don't you love us anymore? What did we do? I'm so sorry if it was me. I promise I won't do it anymore!"

Sahara had come up and was reaching for Molly. She gave a strangled cry when she heard those words from her daughter and leaned against the car with her face in her hands.

"No, Molly, I do love you," I told her. "You didn't do anything. You're perfect and I'll never stop loving you. I love your mother, too, and I'll never stop loving her. Just let me take you both somewhere and I'll show you how much I love you. I'll show you both how much you're loved."

Fredrick opened the door and Molly climbed in. "Come on, Mom," she cried. "He loves us, I knew he did. Where are we going, Bleys?"

"Not far," I said. "Sahara, will you come with us, please? Just give me a chance. If you want to I'll bring you back here later and I'll never bother you again. Just give me a chance."

She let me put her in and I climbed in beside her. Fredrick closed the door and we drove to the IHOP. When we went in, Molly gave a cry of delight and ran off to hug everyone. Sahara nearly broke down when she saw everyone sitting at a big round booth. Cloe, Alicia and Malina slid out and guided Sahara, Molly and me inside. We slid around and we all ordered breakfast. There was a hubbub of talk and every word of it was aimed at Sahara and Molly, telling them how worried we had been, how badly we missed them and how much we loved them and wanted them to come back. Molly beamed like a lighthouse and Sahara cried and smiled through her tears. We stayed and drank coffee and then Sahara and I went for a walk.

She shivered and I slipped my jacket around her shoulders, pulling her tightly against me while we walked.

"Baby, why did you run from me?" I asked her.

"I'm afraid, Bleys," she said. "I just panicked. I saw what happened to Malina. It scared me to death. I couldn't take that. I'm not strong like her. It would kill me and Molly would be left all alone. I couldn't stand the thought of that happening so I ran. I'm sorry, Bleys. I'm sorry I'm not strong like you."

I stopped walking and we sat on a bench. I tilted her face up to look in those eyes that had stolen my soul. "You're the strongest person I know," I told her. "You just have to believe in yourself. You've raised Molly and she's the sweetest little girl any of us have ever known. You did that all by yourself, with the whole world against you, and you kept her and fought for her. Fight for us, Sahara. Imagine what you can do when you have your family to fight with you. Every one of those people back there is fighting for you. They'd do anything for you. I'd die for you. They love you and I love you and I'm never going to stop. Don't run from me again, Sahara. I'll find you wherever you go and love you. I'm going to spend the rest of my life with you. I'm not David. Like I told Malina, he's an asshole. I never abandon people who love me and depend on me."

She leaned against me. "I know, Bleys. I really do, I'm just so scared. Every person I've ever loved has left me or I had to leave them. I told you I'm a mess."

"I know, but you're my mess," I laughed. "I'm yours, too, and what you just said isn't true. What about Molly?"

I saw a light dawn in her eyes. "You're right," she exclaimed. "What was I thinking?"

"You were thinking about bad things," I said. "I told you that the bad things are gone. Are you ready to come home, Sahara?"

She stood up. "Yes, I am. Take me home, Bleys."

We started the long walk back and Molly was waiting.