Don't Get Mad, Get Even

The next few days passed by in a blur. I sat out on the deck and watched the world go by. I remember Sarah making me eat from time to time. I remember her moving furniture around the house but I had no idea why she would re-arrange the God damned house at a time like that.

I also remember her smiling at me and telling me she loved me and that I had to give it some time. I barely remember the funeral. I remember that Rick and Georgia's two older boys were there. But her youngest boy was only seven. And Stevie was barely over two. So they weren't at the funeral.

Deb and her husband spoke very kindly to me, and I remember them telling me to come and visit the boys whenever I wanted. They told me they would bring the boys to visit us from time to time too.

I remember Sarah talking to Deb about car seats and a bunch of other crap and then suddenly, I snapped out of whatever funk I had descended into.

"She's gone," I said. The words, barely a croak, were dragged out of my throat. Sarah was suddenly right beside me.

"I'm so sorry, Honey," she said. "I know how much you loved her."

"Sarah you have no idea," I said. I started crying and got it all out. She stayed by my side and held me.

"I know that I've been out of it for a while, Sarah," I said. "Wasn't there something you wanted to talk to me about?"

"That's been taken care of," she smiled.

"What was it?" I asked. She sighed and pulled the drawer beside our sofa open. She handed me a brochure. In big letters at the top of the brochure was the word "Adoption."

"I can't have kids," she said sadly. "I'd gotten the results from some tests I'd had my doctor do. I was wondering why we hadn't gotten pregnant yet."

I got pissed then. "Is that why you said that I might want a divorce?" I asked. She nodded. "I'll be spanking your ass when I feel better," I said angrily.

"You have a fixation with my ass, don't you," she smiled.

"Sarah, I have a fixation with all of you," I said.

"Well ... I guess we're even, huh?" she asked.

"Huh?" I sputtered wondering what the hell else could happen.

"My mom always had this saying," she said. "She always said, Sarah, don't get mad. Get even."

"I did the stupidest thing in the world, Honey. I cheated on you. And you got even. I'm glad you did. So now there's no reason for either of us to walk around on egg shells. Rick got a chance to use something that you never wanted to share. But you're gonna have me paying for it for the next twenty years or so," she smiled.

"So I get to fuck your ass whenever I want for the next twenty years?" I asked excitedly.

"What is it with you and my ass?" she laughed. "That isn't what I was talking about but if that's what it takes to make you happy, it's all yours."

Just as I reached for her, I heard the sound of a baby crying. I had no idea what the hell was going on. Sarah and I ran up the stairs and into what used to be our spare bedroom. The room had been re-furnished with a beautiful white crib in the center of it.

My daughter Stevie, clutching a blanket was standing up in the crib. When she saw me, she stopped crying. "Da da," she said happily. I picked her up and she giggled.

"We're even," said Sarah. I hugged her too.

Two weeks later it all made sense. We were called to a meeting by Rick's lawyer. Both Rick and Georgia had left wills. Their house was to be sold with the proceeds divided equally among their children. Their investments, Insurance and savings were also to be put into a trust for the kids education and benefit when they were adults.

Deb and her husband were designated as the guardians of the three boys. I was automatically given custody of Stevie as her biological father. As he'd told me, Rick knew. Sarah, found out about Stevie when Deb came right out and asked her if we wanted Stevie to go home with the boys. Deb showed her the will and the DNA tests, and Sarah, to her credit and my eternal gratitude, stepped up to the plate and accepted OUR daughter.

A few weeks after the reading of the will, the trucking company settled out of court with us all over the accident to prevent any civil suits or bad publicity. I saw through all of their magnanimous behavior though. There were a lot of Michigan citizens already complaining about the truck clogging up our freeways and landfills. Garbage is apparently big business.

Someone in the company had done their research. A restored Chevelle SS can bring two hundred thousand dollars at one of those fancy auctions. The company offered me two hundred and fifty thousand dollars. When they discovered that Stevie had lost her mother they added another half million. I put Stevie's money into her trust fund and used the Chevelle money to buy myself a 67' Mustang fastback as my next project car. I only spent forty grand on the car and got right to work taking it apart.

I took Sarah and Stevie on a nice vacation before returning to work and settling down in our lives. The highlight of the trip to Ibiza wasn't seeing Sarah's ass poking out of a variety of swimsuits, although seeing that did give me and a lot of other men on the beach painful erections. The best moment of that trip was our first day on the beach. I was lying on a blanket while Sarah walked over to the one of the little beachside carts that sold ice cream and drinks. I enjoyed the extra little sway she put into each step as I watched her Kardashian-like ass swinging from side to side with each step. But my heart burst when Stevie got up as Sarah came to us and said, "mama," in that tiny little voice. Sarah still cries every time I bring it up.

Epilogue

I did finally stop things with Sarah's mom eventually too. I wanted to stop when Sarah and I got back together, but the old lady started blackmailing me. She told me that she wasn't even with her husband yet.

Anyway she had bought and set up one of those sex swings for us to try out. She ended up dislocating her hip while I fucked her in it. I had to painfully extract her from the swing and get her into her car. I drove her to the supermarket near her house. I slid her over into the driver's seat. She called her husband and told him to come and get her. He called an ambulance and she was hospitalized. She ended up getting her hip replaced. She told him and the doctor that as she had tried to stand up her foot slipped.

We haven't done anything since then but she still looks at me cross eyed every time we get together for the holidays.

Well that's the end of my story. As I finish writing this on my iPad I see my beautiful wife Sarah coming down the stairs.

"Honey, while Stevie takes her nap, we have to talk about something," she says. "I was trying to trim those hedges near the Rose bushes with you electric chainsaw ... Uhm it slipped and hit that metal post that the fence thingies connect to. Don't get mad, but I think it's busticated."

"Sarah, you should know me by now," I smiled. "I don't get mad. I get even." As soon as I finish saying it, she got the biggest smile on her face. Then she bent over and pulled her panties down ...

The end.