Let Go

"Let me call Mrs. Ingalls. She'll know what to do."

Mrs. Ingalls was the family law expert Susan had recommended. A retired Judge, she went back in to private practice after retiring from the bench, taking a very limited number of cases. She never had more than three clients at a time, and was very selective on who she chose to represent. They found her to be a likable person, and Ari loved to sit on her lap and play with her long silver hair, but when it came down to it, she was tough as nails.

"In one way, it should be fairly easy to give custody of the minor to the sister. She's in a nice home and holds a steady job, has no record, no tattoos or piercings, neat, clean, and quite pretty. If you guys get involved, it might get sticky because of your recent separation. You know you can't adopt Marsha because she's of legal age. There's nothing to stop her from having her name changed to yours, or of you formally recognizing her as a daughter. On the other hand, you both have good jobs, are in decent financial shape, and the fact that you're seeing a counselor and are willing to wait a year before starting the proceedings should help a good bit. The grandfather could be a bit tricky, but it will be hard for Social Services to give him a four year old if Marsha refuses to move back. His age, his history, and his attitude will weigh against him.

"Try not to antagonize him, allow him access to his granddaughters in a controlled situation, get him to see they would be better off with you. If he fights, well, we fight."

Bev told Mrs. Ingalls of the incident, and she promised to get Social Services to inspect their home and get the initial interviews out of the way. "At the same time, they would revisit the grandfather, look for evidence of anything that would make the case for an unfit home. They may even be able to persuade him to let them go because of his age and health. We'll see how it goes. In the meantime, keep an eye out."

Social Services did come out, inspect the house and interview Beverly and Dave. They could tell that they were impressed with the house. They had scrubbed it top and bottom twice in anticipation of the visit. Ari didn't know who they were and was her normal outgoing self. They didn't have to ask to see her room because she dragged them up to see her toys and stuffed animals, chattering the whole time. Then she dragged them outside to see her shiny new swing-set and sandbox. Marsha remained calm and levelheaded as she described the atmosphere in the house as warm and loving. She sniffled a few times as she told them it felt like the first home they'd ever had.

Apparently, it did not go so well for the grandfather. It seemed Marsha did most of the cleaning and all the cooking while they lived with him, so they found a dirty house and a sink, counter, and table overflowing with dirty dishes and takeout containers. Mrs. Ingalls assured Beverly and Dave that their interview went very well and it was pretty much a done deal. She was right, because a month later Marsha became Ari's legal guardian. The grandfather never once came to see them, and Marsha finally took Ari, escorted by Dave, to see him. He wouldn't let them in the house, slamming the door in their faces. Ari looked sad for a few minutes before cheering up and demanding they 'snuggle' in the massively huge hammock Dave had found somewhere. It was big enough to hold Beverly, Ari, Dave, and Marsha.

They would giggle at the way they had to lie down. Dave would grab Beverly and flop backwards, and Marsha would toss them Ari as she giggled and squealed. Then Marsha would lie down beside Beverly and they would all rock gently to and fro. It usually put them all to sleep. Beverly would never forget the day Marsha asked if she could snuggle with Dave for a change. She sometimes found them asleep in the hammock, Ari nestled between them. She took pictures, and Marsha put them on Facebook with the caption "Snuggling with our Dad". Beverly showed it to Dave and he surprised them all by rushing out of the room. She found him crying in the backyard. He gave her a huge hug and kiss. "Sorry. It's just something I never thought I'd see." He came back in and gave both girls a huge kiss.

*****

He would like to say marriage counseling was a walk in the park and they only had to go a few times, but that wasn't the case.

Their counselor was a pretty shrewd woman. She had them tell her in separate sessions why they split up, and why they decided to get back together. She popped all her insights on them during the sessions. There were times when they shouted at each other, and times they cried and hugged as if they were afraid the other would disappear if they let go. She would lead them along like lambs to slaughter, then prop them back up and analyze everything when they were done.

It seems he harbored a deep resentment of her almost unilateral decision to not have children. She resented Dave for trying to bring it up every once in a while. In the end, they learned a lot of things.

The primary one was the fact that they lost sight of the marriage in pursuit of their careers. He found that while he was very proud of what she had accomplished, on many levels he resented it, especially when she started minimizing him as she climbed the ladder.

She resented the fact that while he was a very good salesman, he didn't have the burning desire to get to the top. He almost laughed at that. "If we were both like you, the marriage would have been over long ago."

That set her on a crying jag but after she recovered, she understood his point. She hurt him pretty badly when she said she felt he was too passive and she felt like she wore the pants in the family. Then he realized she was right about some of her feelings. It was only after she committed the ultimate in disrespect to him that he started pushing back.

Sometimes they'd come back still upset and not speak much. Ari would sense their moods and jump back and forth, snuggling until they were both in better moods. Marsha would hover, understandably worried about what would happen to them, until they pulled her onto our laps and Bev would love on her.

He would never forget the day he went to fetch Ari from daycare and she came running to him. "Daddy!," she yelled as he picked her up. She'd heard all the other kids calling their parents Mom and Dad and decided that was the way it was supposed to go. He told her, after he got his emotions in check, that if he was Daddy, then Beverly was Mommy. She seemed to understand that logic because she jumped down from the truck and ran to her, carrying a cut out dinosaur with little red puffballs glued along it's spine.

"Mommy! Look what I made for you!"

Dave honestly thought Beverly might faint. Then the tears came. Marsha and Dave watched for a minute and she turned to him. "Well done, Dad."

Then his tears started leaking. The dinosaur hung in a shadowbox on Beverly's office wall until she retired.

*****

She stood in the hallway of their house, waiting. Marsha stood by her side, holding her hand. It had been almost two years since Dave and Beverly started on the long road back to each other. This was the last step on the path. She heard the music start and Marsha held the door for her.

She was still thinking about the conversation they'd held while they were waiting. "Thanks, Mom. Thank you and Dad for saving us, giving us a loving home, and believing in me. I can't believe I'm going to be a junior in college next year! I promise to do well. After all, I have a heck of a role model to emulate."

Beverly hugged her hard, trying not to ruin her makeup by crying. "It's me who should be thanking you. I had just about lost everything. My career was going up in flames, my husband had left me, and I had nothing left. Then I came to that cookout to make one more effort to get my life back. I not only got my husband back, I got a family as a bonus. Have I told you how much I love you and Ari, and how proud I am of you?"

Marsha laughed. "Every day. It'll probably take another thirty or forty years before I get tired of it. Now, straighten that face! It's almost time."

She walked through the door to the cheers and claps of their friends. The reverend of the Episcopalian church they had been attending for the last fourteen months was standing at the bower, smiling. Their friends from the age appropriate group they had joined were there. Jen had even flown in with her husband and five month old son. Sol stood beside Dave, while Susan, dressed to match Marsha and Arianna, took her place on the opposite side from Marsha.

Six year old (six and a half!) year old Ari was standing there with a basket of rose petals, flanked by their (translate, her) boxers, Sonny and Sugar. Each had a little pillow strapped on their back. They stood for a minute, enjoying the scene before Dave slowly walked down the red carpet, preceded by Ari spreading rose petals. The dogs were in their usual positions, one step behind her.

They joined hands in front of the reverend and recited their vows again. She got a big surprise when Ari handed Dave her ring. Dave had taken it to the jeweler's for cleaning, and had a large diamond encrusted band wrapped around it. She let him slip it on her finger, glancing at the mother's ring the girls had gotten her for her last birthday, the two different stones twinkling in the twilight. She let a tear slip down her cheek when the Reverend asked who gave this woman away, and Sol answered, "Their daughters do."

*****

It was the third most important day in his life. The first was marrying Beverly the first time. The second was the day Ari's adoption papers were signed and she got to carry their last name. Marsha broke down when he told her she would have to take their last name, too, giving her the papers. All she had to do was file them and the Waxman family was complete.

He grinned as he slipped the expensive band on her finger. It symbolized the old with the original setting, and a new beginning with the upgrade. He already had the one for their thirtieth anniversary in mind.

If he thought he had a surprise for her, she one-upped him in a spectacular way. After the vows and the kiss, she called for everyone's attention.

"Thank you all for coming, old friends and new. There is one more thing to celebrate tonight." She turned and took both his hands, and said the words he never in his life expected to hear.

"Honey, you know I had a doctor's appointment yesterday. It was to confirm something I already knew in my heart. I'm pregnant, honey, eight weeks along. I have no idea how it happened but I consider it a gift from God. Oh, and it's a girl."

People started clapping and cheering, and he reacted in a way they never suspected.

He fainted.

*****

Beverly and Dave sat and watched Ari cross the stage to receive her high school diploma, just as they had watched Marsha do the same for her college degree ten years earlier. Ari had graduated with honors and would be following Marsha to the same university. Dave grinned at Marsha while he held his four year old grandson on his lap. She grinned back while she held his twin sister.

If he though Beverly was a terrific mother, it paled to how she doted on the grandchildren. Marsha had inherited her grandfather's house when he passed, and she had remodeled it to suit her and her then new husband. It made it really easy to see the grandkids, as they had a gravel path that led from backdoor to backdoor. He had already subdivided two acres in between them to build Ari a home when it came time. He'd also bought an empty lot next door for the terror that was squirming on the seat between Bev and himself. Their daughter, Haley, must have been a tornado or hurricane in her past life, judging from the way she lived her life. Always in motion, always on the way to somewhere else. About the only one who could calm her was Ari, who she had followed around as soon as she could walk. The thought of her hitting puberty scared him to death. Maybe it was time to buy a new box of buckshot.

Beverly retired at fifty, jumping off the corporate plane with a silver parachute, sporting gold overlay. She had saved the company, and in a move that she said was inspired by Dave, led it to a merger with the South Korean company that had encroached on her territory. It was a win-win for everyone, and she was considered a business whiz for brokering the deal.

The Chairman flew down to oversee the merger and talk her into taking another assignment. They were sitting in her office and he was admiring portraits of a green dragon with red ridge spine tips, and another dinosaur not as easily identified that was yellow with blue dots.

"I'm sorry, sir. I'm entering a new phase of my life that I want to enjoy to the fullest. My youngest daughter just turned eleven, my middle one is getting ready to enter college, and the oldest, well, you know..."

He grinned ruefully. "We missed the bus on that one. I still can't believe she went to work for the Koreans. Tell her if it doesn't work out, she and Jen will both be welcomed back with open arms."

"I'll pass it along, but I wouldn't hold out much hope if I were you. Jen really likes her new position as general manager at her new company, and Marsha is having a ball working with the Koreans. It's a little insulting when they trot her out to show how progressive they are for hiring American women and putting them in positions of authority, but she's proved her worth and they really are impressed. The owner has his granddaughter working as her personal assistant for the time being, hoping she will absorb her techniques and skill."

They both laughed. "Well, I had to try. Good luck to you, Beverly. Send pictures of the grandchildren when you drop us a line now and then. Think about the consulting position we have on the table. You could work the projects of your choosing, for as long or as short as you want. I'd hate to think I wasted all the energy it took to train you. It might break up the boredom now and again."

"I promise I'll think about it, and you know you can call or email anytime for an opinion. Thank you, sir, for standing by me. It means a lot to me."

He seemed a bit embarrassed. "You were worth it. Goodbye, Beverly."

She grabbed him up in a tight hug as he reached for her hand, dripping tears on the lapel of his expensive jacket. He patted her in that fatherly way of his before she let him go.

She knew, after a year or so, she would consult for them part-time. As long as it was short term and didn't require extended absences, she was fine with it. She really was good at what she did. She figured when the youngest grandchild started school would be about right.

Dave looked at Haley as she squirmed. "Tone it down, H.H.," which stood for Hurricane Haley, "it's about over."

As she smiled at Dave, he remembered the time he heard she was going to join the family. Bev and Dave had decided to renew their vows after their counseling and court appearances to adopt their girls as a celebration of the successful resurrection of their marriage and completion of their family. He was already almost overcome with emotions when she dropped the bomb on him. Pregnant at thirty-eight. She said she didn't know how it happened, but suspected an interaction with some cold medicine. She couldn't quite look him in the eye at times and he knew it was deliberate on her part. If she had just asked him, he would have been ecstatic, but he suspected she was afraid he'd tell her no.

He fainted dead away when he understood what she'd told him and all their family and friends. She looked completely panic-stricken when he woke up, his head cradled in her lap. She was crying and apologizing, so he shut her up the most effective way possible. He pulled her head down for a kiss that felt like it lasted a lifetime. After that, she understood that he was happy.

He worried constantly, but Bev sailed through the pregnancy like it was nothing at all, and continued working until he pitched a fit and she stopped three weeks before her due date. When Haley came into the world, he was there with Beverly. He was lucky enough to present their newest daughter to her and marveled as the tiny bundle wrapped her tiny fingers around one of his. It went straight to his heart, and would always be there.

He had the look on Bev's face when she first saw her daughter recorded, and when he felt down or stressed or just plain old, he'd pull it up and just stare. He always felt better afterwards.

Marsha had Ari and was waiting with Sol and Susan, their 'grandparents'. They had added them to their brood so seamlessly, many thought they really were theirs. When they got to go into the room and hold the baby, there were enough tears to fill a bathtub, but no one was sad. Over the months, everyone saw the bond developing between Ari and Haley. Ari was so small when they got her that she had only memories of them, and for years she really thought she was theirs by blood. She was devastated when she found out the truth, but Bev comforted her. "You may not be family by blood, honey, but you're family by love. We got to choose to love you. I, for one, was hooked the very first time I saw you and you played with my diamond necklace. As far as you're concerned, as far as we're concerned, you are our blood daughter. Nothing will ever shake the love we have for you. Understand? Nothing. Hold your head high and be sure when you hear your name, Arianna Marie Waxman, that it was given by two parents who love you very much."

He lasted a few more years after Beverly retired before he followed her. Sol's daughter was changing and he didn't like the direction she was taking. Sol's death had hit her very hard and she was rudderless for a few months. She finally got over it when Bev showed up and forced her to go to lunch, telling her their story. "When was the last time you surprised your husband with a night of passion? When was the last time you even had dinner with him. This..." she waved her hand around the office, "is not worth your husband. I almost lost mine and I'll never forget the feeling of pain, or the struggle it took to get him back. Think long and hard, Amanda. You think Sol would want this? Hell no, he wouldn't! He'd tell you to sell the damn company before you lost your family. Think back, he ran the company for decades and hardly ever missed dinner with his family or any of your important moments growing up. If he could do it, you can do it."

It must have worked because she hired enough staff and trained them well enough to delegate a lot of the day-to-day operations to them. When she was certain they could handle it, she surprised her husband with a second honeymoon at a tropical location. They made love every day, sometimes more than once, and she shocked the hell out of him by telling him she'd gone off birth control when she started planning their escape and that she hoped she was pregnant. Their first son was born almost exactly nine months later.

Once Beverly and Dave were free, they started on their bucket list that contained all the things they said they wanted to do or try when they had the time. They bought a motorized RV and spent a lot of the summers tooling around the U.S., usually with a grandchild or two along for the ride. Sometimes Haley came along, but she preferred to stay with her older sisters.

Then they shocked them all by spending a month on the island of Crete. Bev had seen it on a travelogue and wanted to see it in person from that day forward. They came home for a month, then spent a month in Portugal. The next trip out was Spain, followed by Italy and France. After taking stock, they decided they liked Crete best, and bought a nice four bedroom house on ten acres. It came with grapevines, citrus trees, even an olive tree or two. It also had a really nice pool. They spent about half the year there. Marsha spent her two week vacation there with her husband and kids, and Ari stayed a month with four of her friends when she graduated from college. Haley was making noises about getting the house for her and six of her friends when she graduated high school. Dave wasn't not too crazy about that idea.