On Being Proactive

I could see Tracy's expression change as she thought about that.

"Second and more important," I said. "I did not ask Frank to tell you about Barry. Frank does not know anything about what happened that night."

"Then why did he bring it up?"

"Back in June when I was trying to find a way to stop you from meeting Barry when he came to town," I said. "I called Frank and asked if he knew Barry's phone number. I told him that you wanted to call his wife Karen because you had missed her when we were in Paducah. I had planned to call Karen and tell her that Barry was trying to get you to meet him in a hotel. I thought that she might be able to put and end to that. That's when Frank told me that Karen had divorced him and why and then he told me about how Barry had girl friends in different cities and how he pretended to be traveling on business so he could go visit these women. Frank only brought that up because I had told him you were interested in getting a hold of Karen."

Tracy's eyes got bigger.

"Why didn't you tell me about all this before I met with Barry that night?" She asked.

"I wanted you to decide what you were going to do based on how you felt about me," I said. "I didn't want to win only because you found out at the last minute that Barry was really just an ass hole."

Tracy came and sat next to me on the bed and ran her fingers through my hair.

"Let's do this now," she said. "I know you have some questions that have been bothering you so ask them now."

"I guess this all goes back to the night Barry called you and I listened in on the call. He made a comment about the way the two of you were dancing as though it had some significance," I said.

"I guess it had some significance to him," Tracy said. "I was feeling pretty good from the drinks I had and it was fun talking about old times with Barry. Then he asked me to dance and I didn't see any harm in that but when the band played a slow number he pulled me close to him. I didn't think anything of it at first but he put his hand on my ass and I made him move it right away but I didn't push him away from me as we continued the dance."

"Why didn't you tell him that night on the phone that you didn't like what he had tried while you were dancing?"

"Because I didn't think it was important so why make him feel bad? I did tell him it was inappropriate and it had only happened because I had been drinking," she said.

"What about the kiss? He made it sound as if that kiss was rather passionate." I said.

Suddenly Tracy kissed me on the lips. Just a brief kiss with no tongue.

"That is the way I kissed him. I told Barry I had to get back to you and I gave him a quick kiss to say good bye. He just tried to make it seem more important than it was hoping to make me believe it too."

"If you knew that then, you must have realized what he wanted when he asked you to see him when he came to Cincinnati. When you agreed to see him you said it would only be for dinner and conversation and then added that he shouldn't expect anything more. Telling him not to expect anything more is not the same as telling him that there would be nothing more. You left him with the feeling that he still had a chance to get into your pants. Why did you do that?" I asked. "Why did you agree to meet him?"

"I don't know what made it so important to me. I knew what he wanted and I was flattered that he was interested in me but not enough to have an affair with him. I dated Barry during our senior year of high school and that summer after school ended. Barry was my first and we were sexually intimate during most of that time. The sex was exciting because it was new to me but Barry was selfish and egotistical and by the end of the summer I knew that I didn't love him so I broke up with him. Barry kept saying that I would come back to him and that the break up was only temporary. He told me that I would always want him sexually because he was my first lover and women never forget their first lover.

"In one of his e-mail notes Barry said that we should see if there was any magic between us. I felt that he had challenged me. He was saying that if we got together I wouldn't be able to resist him. The way he had said we would have dinner and conversation and then see what would happen just made me want to show him that he was wrong about me. I wanted to show him that there was no magic between us. I wanted to show him that I could spend the evening with him and not go to bed with him. I guess I got so hung up with my need to prove him wrong that I forgot about what was most important in my life, you and the children."

I started to ask another question but Tracy stopped me.

"It's 7:15 and we have a 7:30 reservation for dinner and you still need to change. We can continue this discussion later."

"Okay, but what am I supposed to change into?"

"My loving husband?"

"I already am that but I didn't bring a change of clothes with me. After all, I didn't know that I was supposed to," I said.

"I brought clothes for you. They're in the closet. Hurry and get ready."

I quickly washed up and put on gray dress slacks with my navy blazer. When I came out of the bathroom Tracy was on the phone.

"Yeah, we're going to dinner now. Thanks so much for your help," she said.

"Who was that?"

"I just wanted to call Jackie and tell her that everything worked out okay. It did, didn't it?"

"I guess so but I still think the trick you played on me was a little too cruel," I said.

"You may be right and I am sorry. If I had known that you didn't put Frank up to telling those stories about Barry I would have made sure I ended this last week."

Tracy kissed me and then we headed for the elevators. Tracy talked as we went.

"I am serious about answering all of your questions about what happened. I just hope that you learned a lesson from this. If you think something is wrong, talk to me about it. You do realize that if you had told me you heard that first phone call that would have been the end of all of this. That is not to say that the whole thing was your fault but for you to have that information and not act on it surprised to me. You are usually very proactive."

In retrospect I knew she was right about that but...

"You're right," I said. "I should have acted immediately but the situation was so emotionally charged that I was not thinking straight. The bottom line is that, no matter what your reasons, you should never have agreed to meet him that night."

When we got off the elevators in the lobby I stopped Tracy and put my hands on her shoulders and turned her to face me.

"We both fucked this up royally. Let's put it behind us now," I said.

Tracy didn't say anything, she just took my arm and we started to walk toward the restaurant. Tracy suddenly stopped pulled me in the other direction.

"We can be a few minutes late for our reservation. There is a something in one the of meeting rooms down the hall that I wanted you to see," she said.

"What is it?"

"It's a special sale on golf equipment. I thought that you might find something there that I could give you for your birthday to make up for the lousy trick I pulled on you."

We walked down the hall to the room Tracy was looking for but the door was closed.

"Looks like we're too late," I said.

"I can hear people in there. Try the door," Tracy said.

The door was not locked and as soon as it opened Tracy pushed me through the door and into the room. I thought she had lost her mind and as I turned to look at her I realized that there were a lot of people in the room. Before it could register on me what was happening I heard a loud chorus of 'Surprise! Happy Birthday!'

I was stunned. I looked around the room and saw my parents, Tracy's parents, Matthew and Lisa, Jackie and her husband, my boss and several of our friends. When I looked back at Tracy she was smiling brightly. She kissed me and said, "Happy birthday sweetheart."

I spent the next twenty minutes circulating around the room greeting friends and thanking them for coming and agreeing with them that I was lucky to have a wife like Tracy. When we finally sat down at our table with Matthew and Lisa and our parents, my father held up his wine glass and said, "Happy birthday son," and everyone at the table touched their glasses together, even Matthew and Lisa, and then drank.

Tracy only took a small sip of wine and then she turned to me and ran her fingers into my hair and leaned over and kissed me gently on the cheek just in front of my ear.

"I hope you know how much I love you," she whispered. "I have another surprise for you. I'm pregnant."

I turned to look at her beaming face.

"Really?" I asked.

Tracy just nodded her head. I took her face in my hands and kissed her hard on the mouth.

"I take it you are happy then?" she asked.

"This is a much better present than those golf clubs would have been."

The End.