Who Knew?

"Fire!" shouts the warden. I feel a shock bigger than anything I've ever felt in my life, but there is like I've been told no actual pain. There's a trickle of moisture or liquid all over my lower body and the ground comes up to meet me. I must have been able to develop partial super powers because I was sure that I heard the actual firing pins hitting the rifles on all of the guns that were loaded with blanks. Surprisingly enough, I didn't hear the actual explosion of the live round. They all rush over to me and I'm beginning to wonder why I'm still conscious. Josh actually cradles my head in his lap.

"What the hell happened?" he yells. "Why is she on the ground? Oh God, this smells awful!" he screams.

It has all been worth it. I got to touch my husband one last time and have him care for me and what happened to me. I lose consciousness feeling him stroking my hair.

* * * * * * Epilog * * * * * *

I don't know how much time has passed but I hear the sound of Josh's voice. I can only assume that we're both in heaven and can be together again.

"Wake up Brianna, you're not dead," he snaps.

"What?" I yell. My eyes snap open and I look at him. I'm in a bed in the prison infirmary.

"But I was shot," I said. "I felt a huge jolt and there was blood all over."

He looked at me and said, "No. When the warden yelled fire you were so afraid that you had a mild heart attack. You pissed all over yourself, there was no blood. You were never shot because ALL of the guns were loaded with blanks. My lawyers convinced the Governor to prank you. You were never going to be killed anyway. There is no death penalty for murder two. But your crimes were so bad that everyone from the judge on up agreed that we needed to throw a shock into you. Brianna you're not a bad person, you just made some fucked up decisions."

I looked at him and smiled. "Josh, I saw you at the firing squad. You still love me."

"That's my punishment," he said. "I have to spend the next fifty years married to a woman that I don't love, no matter how hot she is, while I try to make myself forget about you."

"I'll get out in fifty years?" I asked. He nodded his head and I smiled.

"That's not really that bad," I said. "In fifty years we'll be together for the rest of our lives," I said.

"Maybe," he said. "Who knows?" Then he actually kissed me. It was a soft, incredibly gentle kiss that would have to last me for a very long time and we both knew it.

"That's more than I could have hoped for, as punishments go," I said.

"That's really not your punishment," he said. Even as he said it, the door opened and a very radiant, very happy, very pregnant Elena walked in. As she walked across the floor, she seemed to glide as if even gravity loved her so much that it refused to hold her down. On her finger was a diamond big enough to choke Godzilla.

"You're pregnant?" I gasped. She smiled at me and nodded.

"Josh doesn't waste time," She smirked, "but this is only the first one. I want lots of babies and we're going to practice a lot, too." She grabbed Josh's hand and led him out of the room. After Josh left she turned back to me and whispered. "When you get out, I'll still be here; and I'm not worried. It'll only take you a couple of days to do something so stupid you end up back in here."

I just smiled and lay back on my bed. I made a list of things I needed to do. I had to get lots of exercise and make sure to eat as well as I could while I was in prison. I needed to stay in the best shape possible because in only forty-nine years, eleven months and three hundred and sixty four days, I'd be back with Josh. There was no way that Polish baby factory could keep us apart. Nothing could do that. But if she tried, I had almost fifty years to come up with a plan to take care of her ass. I'd be a lot smarter by then. I guess she was right about one thing though. For most of my life I'd been my own worst enemy. Who knew? I fluffed up my pillow and started to imagine how I'd do it as that damned song starting going through my head again.

Who knew?

The end.